Recognize the loss - acknowledge the death and understand its ramifications.
React to the separation of the loss - bothe the primary and resulting secondary losses. Experience the pain; feel, identify, accept and express the myriad emotions encompassed by the term 'grief'.
Recollect and re-experience the deceased and the relationship. Review and remember realistically - revive and re-experience all the feelings involved including the negative aspects of the relationship.
Relinquish attachments to the deceased and the old assumptive world.
Readjust to move adaptively into the new world without forgetting the deceased.
Re-invest the freed up energy in a new life or identity.