Jackson's gonna take one look at me and leave yo behind in the dust.
Mama's dress is gorgeous. It cost more than my wedding dress.
It did not. It was on sale.
Thats what she told daddy. What she actually means is that is was for sale not one sale
Now Shelby, fill me in on the reception
There's going to be ferns and twinkly lights. There'll be magnolias in the pool.
I just hope your father doesn't get any magnolias from Oiser's side of the tree. We'll never hear the end of it.
The wedding cake will be by the pool. The grooms cake will be hidden in the carport.
Shelby and I agree on one thing...
The grooms cake! Its awful. It's in the shape of a giant armadilla
...I can't even think of how you would make gray icing.
Worse! The cake part is red velvet cake. Blood red! People are going to be hacking into this animal that looks like its bleeding to death
The rehearsal supper was an experience
It wasn't that bad it was out on jacksons uncles place on the river
...She'll be fine if we can get something into her. Drink some more Shelby.
I'm going to leave if you don't leave me alone
...It wasn't the easiest thing to sit there and watch your childs heartbreak
Don't talk about me like I'm not here.
...He's crazy about her and...
He said Shut up. Don't be stupid. There's plenty of kids out there that need a good home. We'll adopt 10 of em. We'll buy em if we have to.
Jackson sounds like good people to me
I knew right then and there that if he was dumb enough to spend the rest of his life with me, then I'm dumb enogh to marry him...OH gosh..Oh gosh I'm so sorry Mama...Than you mama
...I'll be glad to give you a touch p before you leave on the honeymoon
I'm going to leave it up as long as possible
Shelby about what Jackson said...
I'd rather not talk about it Mama. What happens in my life now is between Jackson and me. Jackson will take care of me and I will take care of him.
...Shelby? Did you hear what I said?
Mama. I know all about adoption. And I also know the limitations of this body of mine. I would never do anything stupid.
...his imaginary playmates wouldn't play with him
Your boys grew up fine theyre just a little scary thats all
...I would never violate their confidence.
When Mama says she doesn't talk, she means it. She's a brick wall..
Why don't you drink it? It's going to be a while before the bridesmaid's luncheon.
You know what you need in here Truvy? You need a radio. Music is wonderful to have in the background it takes the pressure off havin' to talk so much.
...I now know I was the victim of PMS
I've gotten four radios as wedding presents. I'll give you one.
A small town radio station can be a license to print money if its run right
Miss Clairee You should buy KPPD You got plenty of money
you see our backyard is full of fruit trees
which are full of birds. Daddy's been trying to frighten the birds out of the trees by making loud noises I didn't want the guests at my reception to spend all night dodging bird do.
All I know is that my poor animal has to be sadated he has a condition
Are you sure thats true? Rhett is a very old dog.
I'm not even sure he has opposable thumbs.
Ms. Ouiser Daddy is not trying to drive you crazy he's just trying to make my reception nice. His heart is in the right place.
His color is good. His skin is real pink.
I know for a fact there will be no more gunshots. So why don't you relax Miss Ouiser Have some coffee
I keep asking myself...why me?
We are all awful. We are all hateful awful people. Here all we've been talking about are weddings and psychotic animals we've bee tearing you up inside haven't we? I can't tell you how sorry I am/ and you've had such a terrible time. sometimes we don't know how lucky we are.