43 terms

SPCM 3: Ch.11

STUDY
PLAY
committed romantic relationships
relationships between individuals who assume they will be primary and continuing parts of each others' lives
components of romantic love
passion, commitment, intimacy
stages of development
initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, bonding
stages of decay
differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, terminating
initiating
the initial interaction or first contact with another person (consider stereotypes, the other's reputation, previous interactions, and determine whether the person is cleared for the encounter)
experimenting
a period of information, seeking, predicting anticipated outcomes of additional interactions, and reducing uncertainty about the other (marked by high degree of reciprocity in exchange of information, information exchanged is mostly cultural and sociological, a kind of initial testing period)
intensifying
period where the intimacy of the relationship, whether psychological, physical, or both, becomes greater (characterized by nonverbal sophistication, direct expressions of commitment, and idealizing the relationship)
integrating
two individuals and/or personalities fuse or combine into one entity, interdependence develops (adopt each others' mannerisms and speech patterns, social networks merge and begin to treat the pair as one entity, intimacy trophies are exchanged, similarities are overtly accentuated verbally and nonverbally, synchrony of routines occurs, "we" statements)
bonding
a public ritual announcing formally contracted commitments ("going steady", engagement, cohabitation, marriage, or with contracts, becoming roommates)
differentiating
literally becoming distinct (begin using singular or possessive pronouns instead of plural ones; fighting, arguing and conflict occur frequently)
circumscribing
process of constricting or limiting the relationship (limiting frequency, quantity, and quality of communication - more silences and less discussions; restricting depth and breadth of communication; limiting time spent together)
stagnating
to be motionless or inactive (verbal communication does not occur much; there is a sense it is unnecessary because we know how it will turn out; communication is most often unpleasant and nonverbal; communication patterns resemble strangers)
avoiding
distancing (3 kinds: avoidance, disengagement, and cognitive disassociation)
terminating
the end, at least temporarily, of a relationship (can happen anytime, can occur as a result of a single event or an accumulation)
grave dressing
making sense of the end of a relationship; revising perceptions of the relationship, self, and partner (getting over activities, internal v. internal attributions, public distribution of own version of breakup - public support)
Lee's primary love styles
eros, ludus, storge
Lee's secondary love styles
pragma, mania, agape
eros
a powerful, passionate style of love that blazes to life suddenly and dramatically
ludus
playful love; seen as a game
storge
a comfortable, even-keeled kind of love based on friendship and compatibility
pragma
pragmatic or practical love
mania
passionate, sometimes obsessive love that includes emotional extremes
agape
love without expectation of personal gain or return
Knapp and Vangelisti
creators of stages of development and decay
Marston and Hecht
"love ways" researchers
7 love ways
collaborative, active, intuitive, committed, secure, expressive, traditional romantic love
collaborative love
partnership that involves mutual support, increases energy, intensifies emotion
active love
doing things together, increased strength and self-confidence
intuitive love
nonverbal behavior, feeling warm all over, nervous, losing appetite
committed love
based on commitment, spending time together, talking about future, strong feelings of connection
secure love
based on intimacy, communicated through self-disclosure, feelings of safety, warmth
expressive love
overt behavior, doing things for partner, saying "I love you"
traditional romantic love
involves togetherness and commitment, feel beautiful and healthy
1 million people
people in a romantic long distance relationship annually
10%
percent of job relocation resulting in long distance relationships
25-40%
percent of college students in long distance relationships (around half of first-year students are in long distance relationships, as many of one-third of premarital relationships in university settings may be long distance)
Westfield and Liddell
derived long distance relationship maintenance strategies from participant workshops
environmental spoiling
denotes situations in which proximity breeds ill will
relational culture
a private world of rules, understandings, meanings, and patterns of acting and interpreting that partners create for their relationship
placemaking
process of creating a comfortable personal environment that reflects the values, experiences, and tastes of the couple
passion
intensely positive feelings and fervent desire for another person
commitment
the intention to remain involved with a relationship
intimacy
feelings of closeness, connection, and tenderness (underlies passion and commitment)