Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
Terms in this set (34)
*I supposed he'd drop dead if you ever said no to him.
*It's like taking candy from a baby. After all our work burying that dam in the Deficiency Bill. Dropping it now would be a crime.
What's the matter with you, Joe? You've made such a great reputation for yourself in the Senate. As far as you're concerned, I wouldn't take any risk. Besides, you're the logical man from the West on the national ticket, and at the convention, anything can happen.
*Horace Miller! Why, a born stooge. He'll perform like a trained seal.
And here's the genius of the stroke. It means votes. 50,000 boys and 100,000 parents.
*But you made the appointment without asking me. You didn't ask me.
*And how did your governor confer this honor? Did he give to some wealthy and influential citizen to curry public favor? Did he give it to an unworthy hireling? He went down among the people and found a nugget.
I, I, I, I can't help feeling here's been a mistake somehow...I could never see why we needed two Senators from our state when we have a man like Joseph Harrison Paine representing us already...I don't think I'll be much help to you in Washington. But I'll try my hardest. And I'll do nothing to disgrace the office of a United States Senator.
*I suppose when a fella bucks up against a big organization, one man can't get very far.
I should have quit when Foley died. What am I? A secretary to a leader of little squirts... Honorary appointment. Scratch this thing, and you'd find they need a dope for a couple of months.
Eight to five little boy blue is plastered.
*And that Lincoln Memorial. There he was. Mr. Lincoln, staring right at you. He was sitting there like he was waiting for someone to come along.
*I have to go out and dink this over.
*What is he: animal, vegetable, or mineral? What am I doing? Sitting around playing straight for that phony patriotic chatter. Carrying bibs for an infant with little flags as fists.
When I cam here my eyes were big blue question marks. Now they're big green dollar signs.
(Why don't you tell the people the truth for a change?) We're the only ones who can afford to be hones t with the voters in what we tell them. We don't have to be re-elected like politicians.
*He'll vote what his colleagues tell him to just like a Christmas tiger.
*The bills! These bills are put together by legal minds after long study. I can't understand half of them myself. And I used to be a lawyer. When the time comes, I'll advise you how to vote.
Finally, if your bill is alive after all this vivisection, it comes to a vote. Yes sir the big day finally arrives. And Congress adjourns. Catching on, Senator.
*Now here's the principal actor in our play, Don Quixote Smith, man with bill. Over here, one of the supporting characters, the gorilla dressed in man's clothing, McGann. (Diz: You mean puss and boots). Yeah, mostly puss. Another prominent character in our little play, the Silver Knight, soul of honor on a tightrope. When Don Quixote with ill speaks two important words, Willet Creek, the Silver Knight will fall of his tightrope, and puss will jump right out of his boots.
*He'll be tickled pink.
I wonder if this Don Quixote doesn't have the jump on all of us. I wonder if it isn't a curse to go through life wised-up like you and me.
Boy Ranger. Answer to a prayer. Manna from heaven. Didn't even know how to tell the time of day. He's about to blow the machine to smithereens and you with it, Mr. Governor. Listen to me, Mr. Tn Thumbs, from now on you take your instructions from Ken Allen here, I wouldn't trust you to lick a postage stamp.
*For twenty years my methods have been alright for you, since I picked you out of a fly-specked hole in the wall and blew you up to look like a Senator. Either he falls in line with us and behaves, or I'll break him so wide open they'll never be able to find the pieces.
*What is it? Business? If you like business, you can pick any job in the state and go right to the top. Politics? If you like being senator, then you can come back to the Senate and stay as long as you want. You don't have to worry about being re-elected, if you're smart. You take the boys here and Joe Paine. They're smart. They take my advice. Joe Paine has been taking my advice for the past twenty years.
There are a lot of fancy awards around this town. Some are carved in stone. A lot of words. I guess the Taylors and the Paines put them up so a sucker like me could read them. Then you find out what these men actually do.
Your friend Mr. Lincoln had his Taylors and Paines. So did every other man who tried to lift his thoughts up off the ground. The odds against them didn't stop those men - they were fools that way. And all the good in the world came from fools like that.
*They aren't all Taylors and Paines in Washington. That kind just throws big shadows.
*If he ever starts to convince those Senators, you might as well blow your brains out. You know that, don't you? We're either out of business or bigger than ever.
If you ask me, that fellow is making a whole lot of sense.
*All of Washington is gathered to see democracy's finest show, the filibuster, the right to talk your head off, the American privilege of free speech in its most dramatic form. The galleries are packed. In the diplomatic gallery are the envoys of two dictator powers here to see what they can't see back home - democracy in action.
I just wanted to make sure you still had faces.
*(Public opinion made to order). Yeah, Taylor made.
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