216 terms

Speech Final

(verbal greeting) Verbal salutes
"Hi, Hello, etc.."
(verbal greeting) Initiation of the topic
"The reason I called..."
(verbal greeting) Reference to the other
"Hey Joe what's up"
(verbal greeting) personal inquiries
"What's new? How are you doing?"
Nonverbal greetings
waving, smiling, shaking hands, winking
message before the main message
Functions of feedforward
Open the channels of communication with a phatic message, and to preview future messages
substance and focus of the conversation
reflect back on conversation
the goodbye: signals intention to end access and supportiveness
Conversation Process
Opening, Feedforward, Business, Feedback, Closing
Principle of turn-taking: metacommunication
both speaker and listener exchange cues for conversational turns; enable the speaker and listener to communicate about the communication in which they're currently engaged
Turn maintaining cues
communicate your wish to maintain the role of speaker:
audibly inhaling breath
continuing gestures
avoiding eye contact
sustaining the intonation pattern
vocalizing pauses (fillers)
Turn yielding cues
tell the listener that the speaker is finished and wishes to exchange the role of speaker for the role of listener
"Okay?" or "right" to ask listener to assume role of speaker
Dropping intonation
Pausing at length
Making direct eye contact
asking a question
nodding in the direction of the listener
Listener cues
turn requesting cues, turn denying cues, backchanneling cues, interruptions
Turn requesting cues
A listener cue; let the speaker know you would like to say something and take a turn as a speaker
Turn denying cues
A listener cue; indicate your reluctance to assume the role of the speaker
backchanneling cues
A listener cue; used to communicate various types of information back to the speaker without assuming the role of speaker (acknowledgement tokens, overlaps)
Purpose of backchanneling cues
to indicate agreement or disagreement
to indicate degree of involvement
to pace the speaker
to ask for clarification
A listener cue; attempts to take over the role of the speaker; men interrupt more than women
conversation in which there is genuine two-way interaction;
deep concern for the other person and the relationship
objective of dialogue is mutual understanding and empathy
respect for other person
uses positive criticism
willingness to listen
communication in which one person speaks and the other listens; no real interaction between participants
Principle of Immediacy
the creation of closeness between speaker and listener; communicated both verbally and nonverbally
Principle of Flexibility
analyze the specific conversational situation,
mindfully consider your available choices,
estimate the potential advantages/disadvantages,
competently communicate your choice
What does monologue do?
Focuses on his or her own goals and has Has no real concern for the listener's feelings
uses negative criticism and negative judgements
Has no listening cues
Types of everyday conversations
Small talk, introducing people, excuses and apologies, complimenting, advice
Small talk
used to pass time, be polite and confirm all is well
topics are non controversial
Guidelines for effective small talk
be positive
be sensitive to leave-taking cues
stress similarities not differences
answer questions with sufficient elaboration
avoid monologuing
choose topics carefully
Introducing people
mention brief details about how you know the person
mention commonalities between the two
avoid disclosing sensitive information
Use handshake in US-follow culture specific rules in other countries
Excuses and apologies
explanations or actions that lessen the negative implications of an actor's performance thereby maintaing a positive image for oneself and others
Motives for making excuses
maintain self esteem
protect a positive image of yourself to others
reduce stress
maintain effective interpersonal relationships after some negative behavior
Types of excuses
I didn't do it.
It wasn't so bad.
Yes, but
Characteristics of good excuses
Demonstrate that you understand the problem and that your partner's feelings are legitimate and justified.
Acknowledge your responsibility
Acknowledge your displeasure at what you did
Make it clear that your misdeed will never happen again
Apologize-express your sorrow or regret
expressions of regret or sorrow for have done what you did or for what happened; often includes request for forgiveness; help repair the relationship and the reputation of the wrongdoer
Tips for effective apologies
Do admit wrong doing
Do be apologetic
State specific rather than general terms you've done
Express understanding of how the other feels
Express your regret
Offer to correct problem
Give assurance it won't happen again
message of praise, flattery or congratulations; people either deny or accept when receiving a compliment
Compliment can function as
a way of relating to another person with positiveness
a conversation starter
to encourage the other person to compliment you
Suggestions for giving a compliment
Be real and honest
Compliment in moderation
Be totally complimentary
Be specific
Be personal in your own feelings
Compliment for accomplishments rather for who they are or for things we have no control
process of giving another person a suggestion for thinking or behaving, usually change
advice about advice; one of the safest forms of advice
3 types of meta-advice
to explore options and choices
to seek expert advice
to delay decision
Suggestions for giving advice
listen, empathize, be tentative, offer options, ensure understanding, keep the interaction confidential, avoid "should" statements
Suggestions for responding to advice
if you asked for the advice, accept what the person says
resist the temptation to retaliate or criticize the advice giver
interact with the advice
express your appreciation for the advice
Relationship Stages
1. Contact
2. Involvement
3. Intimacy
4. Deterioration
5. Repair
6. Dissolution
Types of contact
perceptual contact, interactional contact, invitational communication
Perceptual contact
you see what the person looks like, you hear what the person sounds like, you get a physical picture of this person
Interactional contact
interaction is superficial and impersonal
Invitational communication
discuss the possibility of further interaction
sense of mutuality, of being connected develops
part of involvement- experiment and try to learn more about the other person
part of involvement- begin to reveal information about yourself
feeling that you can be honest and open when talking about yourself, that you can express thoughts and feelings you wouldn't reveal in other relationships
Parts of intimacy
commitment to other person
communication becomes more personalized, more synchronized and easier
Increase your display of affiliative cues: signs that show you love the other person
2 phases of intimacy
interpersonal commitment phase
social bonding phase
Interpersonal commitment phase
commit yourself to one another in a private way
Social bonding phase
commitment is made public
the weakening of bonds between the parties and that represents the downside of relationship progression; occurs when the reasons for coming together are no long present or change drastically
attempt to fix the problems in the relationship
Two phases of repair
intrapersonal repair and interpersonal repair
Intrapersonal repair
you analyze what went wrong and consider ways of solving your relational difficulties
Interpersonal repair
you may discuss problems and possible resolutions with partner
Strategies for repairing a relationship
recognize the problem
engage in productive conflict resolution
pose possible solutions
affirm each other
integration solutions
risk giving
cutting of the bonds tying you together
3 phases of dissolution
interpersonal separation, social or public separation, goodbye
Interpersonal separation
may not see each other anymore, may not return messages, or physical separation
Social or public separation
follow separation period, it is made permanent ex divorce or break-up
point at which become an ex-lover or ex-friend; may cause relief and relaxation, frustration, guilt, regret
Suggestions for dealing with emotional difficulty
break the loneliness-depression cycle
take time out
bolster self-esteem
seek the support of others
avoid repeating negative patterns
Attraction theory
assumes that people form relationships on the basis of attraction
4 factors of attraction theory
similarity, proximity, reinforcement, physical attractiveness and personality
people like those who are similar to them in nationality, race, abilities, physical characteristics, intelligence and attitudes
Complementarity: occurs when people are attracted to relationship partners that are their opposites
people are attracted to those close to them; physical closeness is crucial in early stages of relationship partners that are their opposites
people are attracted to individuals who provide rewards or reinforcement.
Physical attractiveness and personality
people like others who are physically attractive and have attractive personalities
Relationship rules theory
assumes that relationships are held together by adherence to certain rules; if rules are broken then relationship declines
Friendship rules
standing up for friends when they are not present, sharing information and feelings about successes, demonstrating emotional support, trusting and offering to help a friend in need and trying to make a friend happy when you're together
Romantic rules
1. acknowledge each other's identities and recognize that each has life outside relationship
2. express similarities in attitudes, beliefs, values and interests
3. enhance the value and self-esteem of the other person
4. be open an honest
5. be faithful
6. spend significant time together
7. obtain rewards that are proportional to the effort extended
8. experience a magic in each other
Family rules
what can you talk about?
How can you talk about something?
To whom can you talk to about family matters?
Workplace rules
each organization develops rules unique to its corporate cultures
Relationship dialects theory
assumes that people in a relationship experience dynamic tensions between pairs of opposing motive or desires
closedness vs. openness relationship theory
occurs s most during early stages of development; exclusive relationship vs. relationship that is open to different people
autonomy and connection relationship theory
desire to remain an independent individual vs. wish to connect intimately to another person
novelty and predictability relationship theory
competing desires of newness, adventure vs. sameness, stability, comfortability
Social penetration theory
describes relationships in terms of self-disclosure, the number of topics they talk about and their degree of "personalness"
Breadth (social penetration theory)
number of topics discussed in a relationship
Depth (social penetration theory)
degree to which you penetrate the inner personality of the other individual
Depentration (social penetration theory)
reversal of the depth and breadth of self-disclosure during relationship deterioration
Social exchange theory
theory based on an economic model of profits and losses that assumes that people develop relationships that will enable them to maximize profits
Comparison level (social exchange)
the general idea of the kinds of rewards and profits that you feel you ought to get out of a relationship
Comparison level for alternatives (social exchange)
compare the profits you get from current relationships with the profits you think you'd get from alternate relationships
Equity theory
uses the ideas of social exchange theory, but claims that you develop and maintain relationships in which the ratio of your rewards relative to your costs is approximately equal to your partner's
Equitable relationship
one in which each person derives rewards that are proportional to their costs
being underbenifited=anger overbenefited=guilt
reaction to a relationship threat; feeling we have when we feel our relationship is in danger due to some rival;
emotional feeling that we experience when we desire what someone else has, or more than we do, may feel inferior to someone else
Cognitive jealousy
Emotional jealousy
behavioral jealousy
mate guarding
strategies enacted when we are suspicious that a rival is looking to steal our relationship partner
Integrative communication
positive responses to jealousy
3 types of relationship violence
physical abuse, verbal or emotional, sexual
an interpersonal relationship between two persons that is mutually productive and characterized by mutual positive regard
Friendship types
friendship of reciprocity, friendship of receptivity, friendship of association
Friendship of reciprocity
ideal type characterized by loyalty, self-sacrifice, mutual affection and generosity
Friendship of receptivity
imbalance in giving and receiving; one person is the primary giver and the other is the primary receiver
Friendship of association
transitory; a friendly relationship based on association such as classmates, neighbors or co workers
5 qualities we look for in friendships
utility, affirmation, ego support, stimulation, and security
Initial contact and acquaintanceship
1st stage of friendship development; more guarded in self disclosure, limited ability to empathize with the other and awkward interactions
Casual friendship
a clear sense of "we-nesss" or dyadic consciousness; immediacy is communicated, more open expression and interaction is more coordinated
Close and intimate friendship
intensification of casual friendship marked by increased levels of self-disclosure, affection, caring, liking/loving for other person
Culture and friendships
friendships are generally closer in collectivist cultures than in individualistic cultures
Gender and friendships
women self-disclose more than men; women engage in significantly more affectional behaviors with their friends than men; women build friendships around communication, men build friendships around shared activities
Technology and friendships
online interpersonal relationships are increasing
Network Convergence
as a relationship between two people develops, they begin to share their network of other communicators with each other
love type based on beauty and sexuality-erotic love
love typed based on entertainment and excitement; love is a bam based on entertainment and excitement
love type that is peaceful and slow; companionable love based on friendship and shared activities
love type that is practical and traditional; love that seeks compatibility and need fulfillment
love type based on elation and depression; characterized by extreme highs and lows
compassionate and selfless; varieties of love can combine to form new patterns; love often changes over the course of a relationship
Love and communication
individuals in love frequently use personalized communication (secrets, special meanings)
engage in significant self-disclosure
express love nonverbally with tie signs (gestures that show your'e together)
Culture and love
Asians are more friendship oriented in their love styles than Europeans
What cultures place greater emphasis on romantic love and individual fulfillment?
What culture is more likely to spread love over a large network of relatives?
Gender and Love
men and women experience love to a similar degree but do differ in the types of love they prefer
Traditional couples
share basic belief system and philosophy of life that views blending of two persons into a single couple; traditional sex roles; minimal conflict or power struggles; communication is highly responsive
Independent couples
stress individuality; relationship is important but not more important than each other's individual identity; spend time together but not ritualized; communication includes open conflict but are responsive to one another
Separate couples
live together but view their relationship more as a matter of convenience than a result of mutual love or closeness; together only at ritual functions; maintains traditional and psychological space; traditional sex roles; sees themselves as an individual
Family characteristics-defined roles
each person is expected to play specific roles in relation to one another and follow the rules of the culture and social group
family characteristics-shared history and future
history enables members to get to know one another and to like/love one another; relationships persist in the future
family characteristics-shared living space
most families share living space; is an increase in individuals retaining original homes
Primary relationship
relationship between two people that the partners see as their most important interpersonal relationship
one of 4 basic communication patterns for families; each person shares equally in the communication transaction and each person is accorded a similar degree of credibility; exists more in same sex couples than different sex couples; conflict is not threatening but is exchange of ideas, opinions, etc.
Balanced split
one of 4 basic communication patterns for families: equality relationship is maintained, but each person has authority over different domains, conflict is not threatening, each person has area of expertise
Unbalanced split
one of 4 basic communications patterns for families; one person dominates or is seen as the expert in more than half of the areas of mutual communication; more powerful person dominates arguments
one of 4 basic communications patterns for families; one person is seen as the authority; the powerful person lectures more than communicates and always has final say; few arguments because both know who will win the argument should it arise
Culture influences the kind of love individuals want
Culture influences sex roles
Culture influences whether same sex couples are accepted or condemned
Technology has changed how families manage relationships
occurs when people are interdependent, mutually aware that their goals are incompatible and perceive each other as interfering with the attainment of their own goals
Online conflict
junk mail, spamming, flaming
Workplace and formal group conflict
procedural and people conflict
Procedural conflict
involve disagreement of who is in charge, what the agenda or task of the group should be, and how group should conduct its business
People conflict
occur when one member dominates the group, when several members battle for control or when some refuse to participate
Myths about conflict
conflict is best avoided
if two people are in a relationship conflict, their relationship conflict is bad
conflict damages interpersonal relationships
conflict is bad because it reveals our negative side
Truth about conflict
conflict is neither good nor bad; it is the way that people approach conflict that causes harm
conflict is inevitable
Content conflict
centers on objects, events and persons that are usually external to the people involved in the conflict
Relationship conflict
concerned with the relationship between the individuals
Negative aspects of conflict
often leads to increased negative regard for opponent, conflict may lead you to close yourself off from the other person
Positive aspects of conflict
forces you to examine a problem and work toward a potential solution, you can stop resentment from increasing and let your needs be known, trying to resolve conflict shows relationship is worth it
Physical context of conflict
whether you engage in conflict privately or publicly, alone or in front of children or relatives will influence the way the conflict is conducted as well as the effects
Sociopsychological context of conflict
atmosphere of equality will change the way a conflict progresses vs and atmosphere of inequality; friendly or hostile environment
Temporal context of conflict
conflict after a hard day of work vs. a sequence of good events affects the conflict
Cultural context of conflict
culture influences the issues that people fight about, what is inappropriate in terms of dealing with the conflict, types of conflict, and the aim of conflict
Organizational culture is included in cultural context
Competing conflict style
I win, you lose
Avoiding style of conflict
I lose, you lose
Accommodating style of conflict
I lose, you win
Collaborating style of conflict
I win, you win
Compromising style of conflict
I win and lose, you win and lose
Before the conflict
Try to fight in private
Make sure everyone is ready to fight/discuss ideas
Know what you're fighting about
Recognize that some problems can't be resolved
Consider what beliefs you hold that might need to be reexamined
After the conflict
Relationship repair may be necessary
Learn from the conflict and from the process you went through in trying to resolve it
Conflict that is seemingly resolved can resurface
Increase exchange of rewards
Influences on your choice of conflict strategies
goals, emotional state, cognitive assessment, personality and communication competence, family history
Avoidance conflict management strategy
nonproductive conflict strategy that may involve actual physical flight
Nonnegotiation conflict management strategy
special type of avoidance when you refuse to discuss the conflict or listen to the other person's argument
Active fighting
taking an active role in conflicts; taking responsibility of your thoughts and feelings
Force and talk
when confronted with a conflict, many people force their positions on the other instead of dealing with the issue
Blame and empathy
blame is an unproductive conflict strategy, instead attempt to place yourself in the other person's perspective through empathy
unproductive practice of storing up grievances and unloading them at another time
avoidance of conflict by diverting the conflict by being charming; instead you should be spontaneous and honest
targeting your relationship partner's weakness and using it against them
high context cultures
groups spend a lot of time getting to know one another before engaging in any important transaction; may seem vague, underhanded, dishonest
low context cultures
groups have less prior knowledge of the members so everything has to be stated explicitly; may seem insulting, insensitive
Legitimate power
by virtue of position
Referent power
others wish to be like or identify with you
Reward power
having the ability to give others material or social rewards
Coercive power
having the ability to remove rewards or to administer punishments
Expert power
seen as having high knowledge level
Information or persuasion power
ability to communicate logically and persuasively
Idea generation groups
small groups that exist solely to generate ideas and often use brainstorming
Personal growth groups
support groups that aim to help members cope with particular problems
Information sharing groups
enables members to acquire new information or skills through sharing of knowledge
Nominal group technique
uses limited discussion and confidential voting to obtain a group decision; helpful when some members may be reluctant to voice opinion
Delphi method
group of experts is established but there's no interaction among them; communicate by repeatedly responding to questionnaires; useful for people who live far away
Quality circles
group of workers whose task is to investigate and make recommendations for improving the quality of some organizational function
process of influencing the thoughts, feelings and behaviors of group members
process of empowering others; person who helps others maximize their potential
Emergent leader
performs the duties of leadership, though not asked or expected to and is recognized by the members as the group leader
Traits approach to leadership
argues that leaders must possess certain qualities if they're to function effectively
Functional approach to leadership
focuses on what the leader should do in a given situation
Transformational approach to leadership
leader elevates the group's members, enabling them not only to accomplish the group task but to also emerge as more empowered
Situational approach to leadership
focuses on two major responsibilities of leader: accomplishing the task at hand and ensuring satisfaction of the members
Public speaking
speaker presents a relatively continuous message to a relatively large audience
Communication apprehension
general fear or axiety of public speaking or all forms of communication; also known as trait apprehension
State apprehension
form of communication apprehension that is only experienced in certain communication situations
A good topic is
system of topics; technique from classical rhetoricians that is currently used as creative thinking; ask yourself a series of questions about your general subject to determine the divisions of your general topic on which you might want to focus
Informative speech
seek to create understanding
Persuasive speech
try to influence attitudes or behaviors
Specific purpose vs. Thesis
specific purpose is infinitive phrase, audience focused, realistic; thesis is a complete declarative sentence, message-focused, more ambitious
Audience analysis
construct an audience profile in which you analyze audience members' sociological or demographic characteristics that help you estimate the attitudes, beliefs and values of audience
Primary sources
first hand, contemporary accounts written or spoken by someone who has direct experience with the event; includes original research reports by the research himself
Secondary sources
those that interpret, comment on, analyze or summarize primary sources
Tertiary sources
distillation and collection of primary and secondary sources (articles in encyclopedias, almanacs, etc.)
Criteria for evaluating internet resources
Fairness: does the author present the information fairly and objectively
Accuracy: is the information accurate
Currency: when was the info published
Qualifications: does author have credentials
Sufficiency: is information sufficient enough to establish the claim
relatively brief specific instance that is either real or hypothetical
longer and more detailed example
an example told in story like form
Guides for using examples, illustrations and narratives
stress relevancy, distinguish between real and hypothetical examples, use series of very brief examples to emphasize widespread nature of significance of problem
comparisons that are often using in clarifying ideas and making them more vivid to your audience
figurative-compare items from different classes
literal-compare items from same class
Definition by etymology
traces a term's historical or linguistic development
Definition by authority
explains how an authority views a term
Definition by negotiation
notes what the term is not
Definition by specific examples
using examples to help clarify terms or phrases
Speaking impromptu
speak without any specific preparation
Speaking from manuscript
read aloud the entire speech
speaking from memory
write out speech word for word, commit to memory
speaking extemporaneously
thorough preparation, but no commitment to the exact wording to be used during speech