He's going to get his license taken away if he keeps that up. I'm getting nervous about him, y'know, Biff?
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He's not mocking you, he--Everything I say there's a twist of mockery on his face. I can't get near him.He just wants you to make good, that's all. I wanted to talk to you about Dad for a long time, Biff. Something's--happening to him. He--talks to himself.I noticed that this morning. But he always mumbled.But not so noticeable. It got so embarrassing I sent him to Florida. And you know something? Most of the time he's talking to you.What's he say about me?I can't make it out.What's he say about me?I think the fact that you're not settled, that you're still kind of up in the air...There's one or two things depressing him, Happy.What do you mean?Never mind. Just don't lay it all to me.But I think if you just got started--I mean--is there any future for you out there?I tell ya, Hap, I don't know what the future is. I don't know--what I'm supposed to want.What do you mean?Well, I spent six or seven years after high school trying to work myself up. Shipping clerk, salesman, business of one kind or another. And it's a measly manner of existence. To get on that subway on the hot mornings in summer. To devote your whole life to keeping stock, or making phone calls, or selling or buying. To suffer fifty weeks of the year for the sake of a two-week vacation, when all you really desire is to be outdoors, with your shirt off. And always to have to get ahead of the next fella. And still--that's how you build a future.Well, you really enjoy if on a farm? Are you content out there?Hap, I've had twenty or thirty different kinds of jobs since I left home before the war, and it always turns out the same. I just realized it lately. In Nebraska when I herded cattle, and the Dakotas, and Arizona, and now in Texas. It's why I came home now, I guess, because I realized it. This farm I work on, it's spring there now, see? And they've got about fifteen new colts. There's nothing more inspiring or--beautiful than the sight of a mare and a new colt. And it's cool there now, see? Texas is cool now, and it's spring. And whenever spring comes to where I am, I suddenly get the feeling, my God, I'm not gettin' anywhere! What the hell am I doing, playing around with horses, twenty-eight dollars a week! I'm thirty-four years old. I oughta be makin' my future. That's when I come running home. And now, I get there, and I don't know what to do with myself. *pause* I've always made a point of not wasting my life, and everytime I come back here I know that all I've done is to waste my life.You're a poet, you know that, Biff? You're a--you're an idealist!No, I mixed up very bad. Maybe I oughta get married. Maybe I oughta get stuck into something. Maybe that's my trouble. I'm like a boy. I'm not married. I'm not in business, I just--I'm like a boy. Are you content, Hap? You're a success, aren't you? Are you content?Hell no!Why? You're making money, aren't you?...And I think of the rent I'm paying. And it's crazy. But then, it's what I always wanted. My own apartment, a car, and plenty of women. And still, goddammit, I'm lonely.Listen, why don't you come out West with me?You and I, heh?Sure, maybe we could buy a ranch. Raise cattle, use our muscles. Men built like we are should be working out in the open.The Loman Brothers, heh?Sure, we'd be known all over the counties!That's what I dream about, Biff. Sometimes I want to just rip my clothes off in the middle of the store and outbox that goddam merchandise manager. I mean I can outbox, outrun, and outlift anybody in that store, and I have to take orders from those common, petty sons-of-bitches till I can't stand it any more.I'm tellin' you, kid, if you were with me I'd be happy out there.See, Biff, everybody around me is so false that I'm constantly lowering my ideals...Baby, together we'd stand up for one another, we'd have someone to trust.If I were around you--Hap, the trouble is we weren't brought up to grub for money. I don't know how to do it.Neither can I!Then let's go!The only thing is--what can you make out there?But look at your friend. Builds an estate and then hasn't the peace of mind to live in it.Yeah, but when he walks into the store the waves part in front of him. That's fifty-two thousand dollars a year coming through the revolving door, and I got more in my pinky finger than he's got in his head.Yeah, but you just said--I gotta show some of those pompous, self-important executives over there that Hap Loman can make the grade. I want to walk into the store the way he walks in. Then I'll go with you, Biff. We'll be together yet, I swear. But take those two we had tonight. Now weren't they gorgeous creatures?Yeah, yeah, most gorgeous I've had in years.I get that any time I want, Biff. Whenever I feel disgusted. The only trouble is, it gets like bowling or something. I just keep knockin' them over and it doesn't mean anything. You still run around a lot?Naa. I'd like to find a girl--steady, somebody with substance.That's what I long for.Go on! You'd never come home.I would! Somebody with character, with resistance! Like Mom, y'know? You're gonna call me a bastard when I tell you this. That girl Charlotte I was with tonight is engaged to be married in five weeks.No kiddin'!...Manufacturers offer me a hundred-dollar bill now and then to throw an order their way. You know how honest I am, but it's like this girl, see. I hate myself for it. Because I don't want the girl, and, still, I take it and--I love it!Let's go to sleep.I guess we didn't settle anything, heh?I just got one idea that I'm going to try.What's that?Remember Bill Oliver?Sure, Oliver is very big now. You want to work for him again?No, but when I quit he said something to me. He put his arm on my shoulder, and he said, "Biff, if you ever need anything, come to me."I remember that. That sounds good.I think I'll go to see him. If I could get ten thousand or even seven or eight thousand dollars I could buy a beautiful ranch.I bet he'd back you. 'Cause he thought highly of you, Biff. I mean, they all do. You're well liked, Biff. That's why I say to come back here, and we both have the apartment. And I'm tellin' you, Biff, any babe you want...No, with a ranch I could do the work I like and still be something. I just wonder though. I wonder if Oliver still thinks I stole that carton of basketballs.Oh, he probably forgot that long ago. It's almost ten years. You're too sensitive. Anyway, he didn't really fire you.Well, I think he was going to. I think that's why I quit. I was never sure whether he knew or not. I know he thought the world of me, though. I was the only one he'd let lock up the place.