Interpersonal Communication Chapter 9-10 Test
Terms in this set (38)
The 4 Dimensions of Intimacy
4. Shared Activities
Male vs Female styles of intimacy
Female-Female (Most Open)
Collectivistic vs Individualistic views on intimacy
- Collectivistic cultures do not reach out to outsiders.
- Individualistic cultures make fewer distinctions between personal relationships and causal ones.
Understand how intimacy looks on social media/how it's affected by social media.
Mediated communication can be just as personal as face-to-face interaction.
Relational intimacy may develop more quickly through mediated channels.
Know the number of important relationships most people want at any given time.
Most people want 4-6 close friendships in their lives
Characteristics of family communication
- Family communication is formative (Earliest communication we have)
- Family communication is role-driven (We play a role in family)
- Family communication is involuntary
- Families are systems
- High conversation orientation = open/ talk often
- Low conversation orientation = topics that are taboo
How strongly the family enforces uniformity in attitudes/belief/values.
- High-conformity family: values harmony
- Low-conformity family: values individuality
Communication Patterns within Families
1. Consensual (High conversation, high conformity)
2. Pluralistic (High conversation, low conformity)
3. Protective (Low conversation, high conformity)
4. Laissez-Faire (Low conversation, low conformity)
Types of Friendships
Youthful v. Mature
Long-term v. Short term
Relationship-oriented v. Task oriented
High discloser v. Low discloser
High obligation v. Low obligation
Frequent contact v. Occasional contact
Relationship Turning Point
Transformative events that alter the relationship in a fundamental way.
Ex: A kiss that turns "just friends" into "something more"
3 Types of Conflict Styles
Volatile: Intense, heated arguments
Avoidant: Ignore issues rather than confront them
Validating: Openly and cooperatively manage conflicts
Strategies of Relational Maintenance
2.Openness: Talking directly about the openness of the relationship and disclosing your personal needs and concerns
3. Assurances: Letting the other person know that they matter
4. Social Networks: Being invested in each others friends, families and loved ones
5. Sharing Tasks: Helping one another take care of life's chorses and obligations
Types of Social Support
3. Instrumental: Doing tasks or favor
Minor v. Significant
Social v. Relational
Deliberate v. Unintentional
One-Time v. Incremental
Steps to Relational Repair
1. Expressing Regret
2. Accepting Responsibility
3. Making Restitution
4. Genuinely Repenting
5. Requestion Forgiveness
Two Elements of Forgiveness
Refers to the emotional tone of a relationship
Describes messages that convey value
Describes messages that show a lack of regard
Types of Disconfirming Messages
1. Impervious Response: Doesn't acknowledge the the other person's messgaes
2. Interrupting Response
3. Irrelevant Responses: A comment unrelated to what the other person just said
4. Tangential Response: Instead of ignoring the speakers remarks completely, the other party uses them as a starting point for a shift to a differnt topic
5. Impersonal Responses
6. Ambiguous Responses
7. Incongruouse Rsponses: Contains two messages with more than one meaning, leaving the other party unsure of the responder's position
How climates develop
- When two people start to communicate, a relational climate begins to develop
- Verbal and Nonverbal communication can be climate-shaping
A reciprocating communication pattern in which each persons message reinforces the others
Escalatory conflict spirals
The most visible way that disconfirming messages reinforce one another.
Rather than fighting, the parties slowly lessen their dependence on each other, withdraw and become less invested in the relationship.
Defensiveness becomes the process of protecting our presenting self, our face
Messages that seem to challenge the image we want to protect
2. Problem Orientation
Evaluation vs Description
Judgemental statements (You statements) v. focusing on your thoughts/feelings (I statements)
Control vs Problem Orientation
Trying to control others v. finding a solution both parties are good with
Strategy vs Spontaneity
Manipulative v. being honest/open...not hiding or twisting to get your way
Neutrality vs Empathy
Indifference v. Putting yourself in their shoes
Superiority vs Equality
Im better than you v. showing value to another as someone to be valued/an equal
Certainty vs Provisionalism
Know it all v. humility
Assertive Message Format
- Behavior: Describe behavior/not evaluate
- Interpretation: Meaning you've attached to behavior
- Feeling: How behavior made you feel
- Consequence: What happened as a result of the situation?
What happens to you, the speaker?
What happens to the person you're addressing
- Intention-3 Messages
1. Where you stand on the issue
2. Requests of others (I'm wondering where you're coming from)
3. Descriptions of how you plan to act in the future: Honest consequences or boundaries
Responding Non-Defensively to Criticism
- Seek more information
Ask for specifics
Paraphrase the speakers ideas
Ask what the critic wants: so they feel listened to
Ask about the consequences of your behavior: why does it bother them so much?
Ask what else is wrong: look for hidden meaning
- Agree with the critic
Agree with the facts: own whatever is true
Agree with the critic's perception: Respect their opinion, even if you don't agree
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