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Terms in this set (100)
Good day to you all good folk! welcome to Sherwood Forest this is a place of Lore and legend a place for the most famous characters of all time came to Call Home characters of strength characters of virtue characters such as... Robin Hood and him merry men
Oh merry men merry men my heart is full of grief it weighs heavy upon my soul you gaze on ones who's brightest light has been snuffed by the dark blanket of gloom there is nothing left for me but sorrow and despair play the jack stands before you a man who suffers from anguish of unrequited love there are no means to describe my agony Merry men except to say... I have the boo-boos
Oh no not the boo-boos
Yes I know you're shocked I realize great characters of literature rarely get the boo boos but I have them today my one and only love Lady Marian is lost me forever how can I go on
Hey hey use your coaster
Soon the woman of my dreams will wed that incomparable bad guy the sheriff of Nottingham and from that very moment on merry men life will have no meaning once she marries him he and the prince will conspire to control all the land oh what to do what to do
Well first you could explain to the good folks who the sheriff and the prince are
Well yes I suppose I could gentle folk our beloved England was once ruled by a great sovereign King Richard the lion hearted
Long live the King
Our courageous king left us to fight in the crusades in his absence we have been ruled by his rotten sinister and not at all nice brother the evil Prince John
Boo hiss boo hiss
You see Prince John wants to be crowned king since King Richard has been gone for more than two years law decrees that prince John may take the crown if he is elected by another member of the royal family
But robin the only other royal is the fair Lady Marion she loathes the prince severely and would never dream of letting him become king she wishes him only skin rashes
True friar but acting as ruler jaw decrees that the evil prince John...
Boo hiss boo hiss 2nd time
May give dear Marion's hand in marriage to a suitor of his choice his choice is the sheriff of Nottingham and as we all know the sheriff of Nottingham is... Well he is... He's a worm the mans a worm a slimy slithering little worm you just want to squash him flat with your foot and then scrape them off of your shoe anyway once the sheriff mayor marries Marian he will instantly become royalty thus giving the sheriff power to allow Prince John to be king and what a grim day for all it will be the princes greed knows no limits why the prince isn't even king yet any already raises taxes sky high
Closed schools and orphanages
No! Second time
And most despicable of all... He stopped the sale of Girl Scout cookies
Even chocolate thin mints my son
Yes friar even those
I'll say I mean I can see banishing the lemon creams because what hey let's face it who buys them anyway but no more thin mints why I would indeed rebel against that
Excuse me but... Who are you
Me I'm the towns guy
I see and what exactly is it that you do
Well I... Hang around the town hence the name towns guy this isn't rocket science here
Oh how productive then May I ask what are you doing here if you haven't noticed this is the forest
Well yes I know I just thought I'd hang around here and help you tell the story
That's quite nice but to be honest with you we don't need your help please leave
Flashback! flashback! flashback!
You know that's really getting on my nerves oh very well if you must do a flashback get on with it
Flashback! flashback! flashback second time
I think it's quite a warm and friendly place
Halt surrender your money to me please!
Well at least he said please I do think manners count for something
Thank you my lady
Marian I believe we are in the company of the notorious outlaw Robin Hood
In the flesh
AHHHH! AH HA!
You seem to be out numbered sir
Why sheriff this must be Robin Hood's band of married men
That's merry men my lady let me assure charming lady we are all quite single gentleman
And what a shock that is
Now if you don't mind dear guests your treasures please
And with that Robin snatch the bag of gold from the sheriff
Oh! Marian smiles nervously no hands robin chest of jewels
Ah ... Thank you
You won't get away with this you scoundrel this gold belongs to none other than his Royal highness
Are you speaking of... The evil Prince John
That's your opinion yes it is his gold you Rob
Then it is with all the more pleasure than I lighten your load of this tarnished gold
Hasn't anyone ever taught you that stealing is wrong
I don't consider this stealing my dear lady I am merely returning it to those from whom it was taken because of sheer greed from ones like the prince and Sheriff people young and old are starving children cry at night frightened cold and hungry this gold will feed them clothe them and ease their pain
And it was at this very moment that Robin Hood and the Lady Marian fell in love
Now off with you all don't keep those in need waiting a moment longer
You are the most gracious lady of the land and I promise you dear lady we shall meet again
I most certainly hope so
It is time to set forth on our mission would you like to join me in my quest to aid the needy men of Sherwood
Very well then... Scatter!
I hope we'll see eachother again Farewell
Friar have the applicants for the Merry Men positions arrived yet?
Yes, my son, they have
Good! Bring them forth be they men or be they women, after all here in sherwood forest are an equal opportunity employer and do not discriminate. Merry men i have placed a help wanted add in the sherwood forest daily gazette. we will add to our merry band. remember number one there is strength in numbers and number two the more the merrier.. get it.. you're merry men, oh tough crowd
Beulah of bellows bank
so beulah of bellows bank what prior experience have you had at being merry
well sir i was merry at christmas
i see have you had any other occasions at which you have been merry
well ive been jovial at times, ... like merry only louder
Fine you're hired pick up your spoon and report to work
hello sir im Mary
Ah i see so Mary are you merry
got my masters in merrymaking
oh what college
marvelous get a spoon
hello im laughalot
so lady laughalot what experience have you had at being merry
written opening monologue for david lettermerryman
youre hired, get a spoon // I love that show, NEXT
i was applying for jolly good fellow
oh well are you a jolly good fellow
that nobody can deny
thank you sir
next, hello who might you be
so donald are you merry
are you sure
yes im merry
well then.. give me your most merriest expression
well i guess thatll do grab a spoon
what about my sister
okay fine but you have to share a spoon
ok fine but you have to share a spoon
Oh, friar what to do what to do
My son why don't I go to town to see if there is news. Perhaps an answer to out problem lies there
Yes friar be swift on your journey and bring me word of my dear Marian
Yes my son
Merry men we must devise a plan to save Lady Marian before she is forced to wed the sheriff any suggestions oh quick and clever colleagues
How do you propose we do this without the prince and his guards seeing us
YEAH! 2nd time
The castle is seventy miles away by the Time we get there bulldozers will be invented
It was just a thought!
Are there any other stupid suggestions?
Yes I have one
Then speak oh clod
Behold what happens when you drop out of school. ENOUGH!
Might i be of some assistance?
Publisher's Clearing House Sweepstakes...
STOP IT! JUST STOP IT!! .. Don't think of a plan, I'll think of a plan, Just .. Don't think of a plan
Have you news for me Friar?
Have I ever? Look!
Men Listen.. 'His Royal highness hereby decrees an archery tournament shall take place one week from this Saturday. The winner shall receive one thousand pieces of gold and the hand of Lady Marian in marriage. Entries must be postmarked by Sunday, void where prohibited by law." Merry Men I have a plan! I shall enter this archery tournament! No doubt shall i win, for as we all know, I am the best archer in the land! I shall win the tournament, marry Lady Marian and give the gold to the poor people!
Gee Robin what a great plan
Yes I thought you'd like it. Huzzah Huzzah! Now there is work to be done! First I must practice my archery. For after all, even someone who's the very best must work hard and practice everyday to stay that way.. Did you get all that? Good!
Its ten thirty at night
What better time to begin than now! Will hurry to yon hawthorn! I say unto you hence, be my herald, hasten hither. Hast makes waste for henceforth lies hereafter! Hither and yon is but hence hitherto. So herby, hindrance shall make a heedless hazard! So be not heathen, hurry hero, and hasten hither hence. Huzzah
I have no idea what you just said
Do you see that tree over there?
Stick this on it
Why couldn't you just say that?
Excuse me but it is called the art of language! Allan, my bow and arrow! And now would you like to watch me as I strike a bulls-eye for justice men of Sherwood
Will are you alright?
Fine boss, always wanted to get my ears pierced
Well then, glad to be of help. Huzzah huzzah
..worried his dear Marian must be with the recent turn of events
You know, as the days pass, I cannot help but think how worried my dear Marian must be with the recent turn of events
everyone would live happily ever after
I think I should go to her and reassure her that I will live happily ever after.
..these things is so you don't have to
Yes, but then that would give you more lines then me. And as we all know, this play is called "the somewhat true tale of Robin Hood" not "the somewhat true tale of the towns gal" This isnt rocket science here. Now if you will have your technical director friend take us to lady Marian
and his enormous ego to the chamber of lady marian
i don't have an enormous ego, i just so happen to know I'm the most important person in this play
I don't like the sound of this
you can trust in me good lady
So robin how art thou
Very well, and how art thou
im about to become mrs. wart but aside from that, i art fine
good, did you receive my message?
oh that was from you
Yes good news to you no doubt
.. but thanks for asking anyway
My dear damsel in distress, you have been deceived. The sheriff is indeed a master archer, but he is only the second best bowler in all the land. Stands before you now, the winner of the tournament and your future husband
you? the greatest archer in all the land?
Well marian im not a person who likes to brag...
but when it comes to archery, there is no man better than me! With my bow and arrow, i can split a pea on the back of a flea at five hundred feet away, as long as it is during daylight
is there hope for happiness yet?
yes my love there is hope for hapiness yet
Timing dear girl, you have to work on your timing
OH WHAT SHALL WE DO
Xanax comes to mind
NOOOO I had to be a big shot and work in the castle
Oh no the guards are below
thanks to you im gonna be floatin in a moat somewhere
are you quite finished
Oh im just getting started
Marian i must find a place to hide
My heart is giving out
Something tells me that when playing hide and seek, this is not the first room one chooses
they're not fit to be spat upon by someone of our stature
THAT DID IT
SO! the poor are not fit for you to spit upon! for shame! it is evil hearts like yours that keep the poor in the throes of their deep oppression
I think this would do better if you lose the veil
Oh right, thank you. How dare you make fun of the less fortunate than you. It is no crime to be poor. But it is a crime to be a theif! you and the Prince took away their money, then you took away their homes. And now you mock them.. It is what is inside someones heart that really matters, one person is no better than another person merely because they have money.... Did you get all that? GOOD
Arrest him !!
well dear fellow it looks as though we are about to defeat your crusade for the underprivileged, now doesn't it?
You've only won the battle sir not the war
No please not that
your heart is black
Prince John and the Sheriff will not defeat me! I will escape, then I will save lady Marian and rescue the poor! I can do this for i am good, and because i am good i will not be beaten, there is nothing that in this world that can stop me
"on the twelfth day of christmas my true love gave to me
six geese a laying
Five golden rings
NOT KIDS BOPPPPP
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