What he doesn't know something about you? Surprise. SurpriseWhy don't you like him?Cause he's a playerHe's not a playerPlease. He's a jock. He playsHe's a muscular dork that doesn't know how to talk to girls. He's not a playerThat's just his thing. Some guys come at you all slick and smooth, he charms you with being dopey.Do you really think that'd work?He's dating you, isn't he?Can we please change the subject?Fine. So what's up with this game? Is it some sort of lame senoritis crisis?I know it's stupid. It's just l- i want to know what she likes it so muchOhI know it's just a game but...So how is it?I honestly don't see the appeal. All we've done so far is walk around and talk to things. I thought there were supposed to be monsters- Vera? Vera ? Hello. Oh crap. What the hell is happening ?Three Bugbears after youThree what?Three Bug bearsWhat the heck is a bug bear?What do you do?What do i do? I don't even know what a bugbear is? Are they bugs ? Are hey bears?C- You examine the but bra s they are neither bugs nor bears. T- So this game is mundane, huh? All we do is talk and walk? You want more action?I didn't know things were suddenly going to jump out at usThe first bug bear strikesOw! Whoa! Wait! Don't i get a turn?T- You wasted your turn examining the bugbears. C-Which they appreciate. Bug bears aren't used to getting by such attention. The second bugbear attacks.Don't roll that dice! OW oh godYou've been damagedReally? I couldn't tellWhat do you doI fight back!T-My character does the same. C-Critical roll! Tillius slays one Bugbear. You swing however and miss.What? Look at these things ! How do i miss that?The bug bear strikes againNo, no wait!They missOkay let me thinkYou take a turn to thinkNo, I don't-The other bugbear strikes!Come on!C-Huge damage! Agnes is down. T- Your character is dying, Agnes. What do you want to do?What can i do ?Start playing the game correctlyWhat? How?Stop acting like a sarcastic ogre all the time and i'll help you. Can you do that?....Agnes!Yes, yes i can do thatYou promise?Yes, i promise. What are you doing?C- And this is what happens next...wowYou've defeated the bugbears! Agnes levels up! Gains plus one in being less of a *******Wait is that really a stat?T- Yep totally is..............O-Inconsequential.......and putting things right that once went wrong and hoping each other one that his next leap will be the leap homeThat actually does sound interestingT- He gave it to Tiamat L- What?Question. What's a Tiamat?K- This is a Tiamat.........All have died except for one.....You fought that?yesThat's......No i know who you are. You and me, we hang in the same evil underworld. And i don't think your daddy's going to be too happy you're making time with a Paladin and a humanWho's her dad?The devilThat explains a lotLook please don't tell him okay? He'll kill me!Wow, suddenly someone doesn't seem so tough.Fine. Go to Orcus map.........You must first travel down the River of Wetness to the Swamp of Mushy—-The names of these locations are terribleI was going to go back and give them better names later, but you know i died before i would get to itSorryThen you will climb the mountain of steepness to the castle of evil where you find the TiamatSeems simple enoughBut to be able to face Tiamat, you will have to first fight and defeat all three of her guardians, the Big Bosses of New LandiaThat's less simpleWhat about you Agnes the asshatted? What you say?Of course i'm in.
