Friendship & Romantic Relationships - Recognizing Healthy & Unhealthy Behavior
Terms in this set (53)
Who are friends?
People you have gotten to know over time, who you enjoy being with, and who also enjoy spending time with you.
What do you have in common with friends?
You share similar interests, have fun together and are usually close to one another in age but some may be older or younger.
Who are close friends?
Friends with whom you may have a lot of shared stories, inside jokes, and secrets.
What makes someone a close friend?
They are the type of people you talk to when you need a trusted opinion or someone to talk to about more personal topics because they are someone you trust the most. These are likely people you have been friends with for a longer period of time, but just because you have known someone for a long time doesn't necessarily mean they are a close friend.
Who is a romantic relationship?
Someone you have a shared emotional, mental, and possibly sexual connection with that you have agreed on with each other.
What makes it a romantic relationship?
You feel attracted to them and may care about them or love them in a different way than how you love family members or friends.
How does a romantic relationship start?
Romantic relationships sometimes begin as a friendship, but there are many other ways to meet potential romantic partners. You might be interested in exploring different types of relationships with different people at various points in your life - some people are interested in dating casually, while others are interested in being in a more committed relationship. Romantic relationships are unique to you and the person you are interested in. The type of relationship you have will depend on what you both want and need, which is why we call them "reciprocal" and "consensual."
What do you call someone in a romantic relationship with you?
You could call this person a special friend, crush, boyfriend/girlfriend, partner, or spouse.
When is it okay to call someone a romantic relationship?
Words like "boyfriend," "girlfriend," or "partner" are often used for more serious relationships, and usually should not be used unless you have agreed with the person you are dating that you are both comfortable calling each other those things.
When might you hear someone call another person a romantic relationship when they are not?
Sometimes you might hear very good friends tease each other and call one another "boyfriend" or some other romantic term, even if they are not dating or in a relationship. Don't use these words in a joking or teasing manner unless you really understand how to do so.
What might happen if you call someone a relationship name they are not?
If you use terms inappropriately, you could end up offending or hurting somebody's feelings by misleading or misinterpreting them.
Do you have to be interested in romantic relationships?
You may be interested in romantic relationships at some points in your life, and at other times you might not be. No one is ever required to have romantic relationships, and there is nothing wrong with you if you don't have them.
What are healthy things you can do to feel good without having a romantic relationship?
Sometimes if you do not have a partner but want to have one, you may feel lonely. It's okay to feel that way, but there are also many things you can do to feel better.
Stay busy - when you are doing things you enjoy, you are less likely to feel lonely. Consider what types of activities you like to do or are good at doing. If there is an organization or club that does those types of activities, consider joining.
Spend time with family or friends - you can do this in person, on the phone, or online. Being around people who love you is a good reminder of the people you already have in your life.
Help others - one of the best ways to stop thinking about your loneliness is to do something kind for someone else. You could do things like help an elderly neighbor, volunteer for a charity organization, or walk your friend's dog.
What might happen if I get into a friendship or romantic relationship for the wrong reasons?
It is usually not a good idea to get into a relationship with someone simply because you are lonely. Being friends, dating or being romantically involved with someone just because it is convenient probably won't help you feel better - at least not long term.
When is it inappropriate for romantic or sexual relationships to happen?
In some cases, it is illegal for romantic or sexual relationships to happen if certain power dynamics are present such as a teacher and student romantic relationship or a relationship where one individual has some type of power or authority over the other.
What are signs of healthy communication and disagreements in relationships?
A healthy relationship usually includes good communication, where two people talk honestly with each other. Disagreements and mistakes happen in relationships - they don't necessarily mean a relationship is unhealthy. If people show respect and try to communicate clearly with one another during a disagreement, a relationship is more likely to be healthy.
What are signs of unhealthy communication and disagreements in relationships?
In an unhealthy relationship, you may feel that what you say does not matter or that the other person does not respect what you say. If you are in a relationship with someone who lies, makes you feel uncomfortable, or is not respectful to you, these can be indicators that your relationship is not going well.
What should you do if you find yourself in an unhealthy relationship?
You might decide to end the relationship or to see the person less frequently. You have the right to feel safe, have fun, and feel respected in all your relationships. If you are in an unhealthy relationship, you should either address the problem behaviors or leave the relationship. You should seek help if you notice unhealthy or abusive behaviors in your relationship. You should not try to solve these problems alone. You deserve support, and these issues can be hard to address on your own.
Why is it important to know the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships?
It is important to recognize unhealthy relationship qualities early in relationships because unhealthy relationships can sometimes become abusive relationships later on.
What are the four types of boundaries in relationships?
There are four types of boundaries: physical, emotional, communication and sexual boundaries.
What are physical boundaries?
Choices about what you do and don't want to happen when it comes to your body and personal space.
What are emotional boundaries?
Choices about your feelings, personal values, and responsibilities to yourself and others.
What are communication boundaries?
Choices about how, what, when, and with whom you want to discuss issues related to yourself or your relationships.
What are sexual boundaries?
Choices about how you want to express yourself sexually, both by yourself and with partners.
Why is it important to know yours and others boundaries in relationships?
If you let someone know what your boundaries are, but that person still violates them, the relationship is probably not healthy. In extreme cases, crossing someone's boundaries may be considered harassment, abuse, or assault and be illegal.
Why is it important to know the difference between harassment, abuse and assault?
Unhealthy behaviors in a relationships sometimes escalate and can lead to harassment or assault. It's important to be able to recognize the early warning signs so that you can leave unhealthy relationships as soon as possible. It's also important to understand what harassment and assault are, so that you can seek help for yourself or others if needed.
What is sexual harassment?
Any unwanted attention or advances regarding sexual gratification, favors or other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature.
What is sexual assault?
A spectrum of sexual violence, including any sexual contact or activity without consent.
What is rape?
Any penetration (vaginal, anal, oral) with anything (penis, fingers, objects) done without consent.
What should you do if you have experienced harassment, assault or rape?
Understand it is never your fault if you experience any of these actions and reach out to a trusted person for support if you experience any kind of sexual harassment or sexual violence.
What is staring?
Watching anyone for a period of time without talking to them.
What is standing too close to someone?
Standing close to somebody, without their consent, can make people uncomfortable. This is especially true for strangers or acquaintances.
What is catcalling?
Calling someone crude words or making comments about how they look or dress (For example, "lookin' good," or "you'd look pretty if you'd smile," etc.). Includes making kissing noises or honking a car horn while driving past someone.
What is whistling?
Whistling with the intention of getting a person's attention to show that you find them attractive. This type of whistle is usually recognizable - it's most often a short two-toned whistle (short high note, followed by slightly longer low note). This is different from whistling a song.
What are sexual/rape jokes?
Any nonconsensual joke with sexual innuendo and any joke about rape or assault
What are sexual gestures?
Examples include someone licking their lips in a sexual way, rubbing their genitals over their clothing while someone is watching, or making motions like they are masturbating or having sex.
What does it mean when someone is sharing sexual pictures and videos?
Taking sexual pictures of someone without their consent or knowledge. Showing someone sexual pictures or videos that they don't want to see. This may be pictures of oneself or others, including sexual pictures of other people shared without their consent. It may also include posting images or videos of you online without your consent.
What is stalking?
Following or harassing a person. Some people do this with no real reason except to frighten, annoy, or intimidate. Other people might think they are just showing romantic interest, not realizing that their behavior is scaring others. This can include following a person who you are attracted to just to be near them, or making sure to sit next to them all the time, after they have tried to move away from you or shown that they are not interested.
What is considered inappropriate touching?
Touching someone when they do not want to be touched (includes kissing someone, grabbing their butt, etc.)
What is verbal abuse?
Threatening to hurt someone or using demeaning words.
What is physical assault?
Hitting, slapping, kicking, or otherwise physically harming another person.
What is coercion?
Being asked to do sexual things in exchange for something someone wants (like a job, reward, friendship, etc.) or pressuring someone to do more sexually than they want to do.
What are the types of abuse in relationships?
Abuse can be physical, emotional, social, and/or sexual. An abusive relationship is an extreme form of an unhealthy relationship. Abuse can happen in romantic or sexual relationships, but abuse may happen in any kind of relationship. Other terms for abuse include domestic violence, relationship abuse, and intimate partner violence.
What are the types of abuse in romantic relationships?
If you are dating or in a relationship with someone who hurts you or tries to control you, this is abuse. It includes physical, verbal, social, emotional and sexual abuse.
What are examples of physical abuse?
Hitting, grabbing, pushing.
What are examples of verbal abuse?
Yelling, calling offensive or hurtful names or terms.
What are examples of social abuse?
Forcing or pressuring you to be in social situations that you don't want to be in or socialize in ways that are uncomfortable or painful for you.
What are examples of emotional abuse?
Making you feel guilty, making you feel sad and bad for being who you are.
What are examples of sexual abuse?
Forcing you to have sex or do sexual behaviors you do not want to do.
What are examples of abuse toward someone on the autism spectrum?
Purposefully ignoring your autism-related or sensory needs and sensitivities; telling you that your autism-related needs are not real or that you should just "get over" them; Making you feel bad for not being "normal"; Saying you are "not really autistic"; Saying you are imagining being mistreated or that you are provoking the abusive behavior."; Taking away or limiting your access to augmentative and alternative communication (AAC) device(s) if you use these tools to communicate; Claiming you can't tell what abuse is because your autism prevents you from understanding social interactions.
How do you know if you are harassing someone else?
Some people who harass others know that their behavior is unwanted and choose to continue anyway. Other people who harass others are not aware that their behavior is hurting others.
Why is it important to know if you are harassing someone else?
You might have trouble interpreting the subtle signs showing that people are not interested in a friendship or romantic or sexual connection with you. Harassment that is not done on purpose is still harassment, and it is just as harmful as intentional harassment.
What does it mean when relationships are reciprocal or consensual?
Both people want what is happening to happen.