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Social Psychology chapter 8
Terms in this set (57)
quality of being sensitive
as a relationship moves towards greater intimacy, what becomes increasingly important is authenticity - our ability to give up trying to make a good impression and begin to reveal honest things about ourselves. pg 395. authenticity implies a willingness to communicate a wide range of feelings to our friends and loved ones, under appropriate circumstances and in ways that reflect our caring
- needing to be with the other person, feeling loyal
relationships in which neither partner is keeping score; feeling that over the long haul some semblance of equity will take place.the closer and more intimate a relationship, the more communal it will become. ppl in communal relationships are eager to be responsive to the needs of their partner.
a love that is a milder more stable experience marked by feelings of a mutual trust, dependability, and warmth. compared with the typically short lived intensity of romantic passion, companionate love generally lasts longer and deepens over time. (
According to Sternberg's theory, a combination of intimacy, passion, and commitment (the ultimate goal, achieved rarely) page 391
relationships in which the people involved want to make sure that some sort of equity is achieved and that rewards and costs to each of the partners is fairly distributed. if their is a major imbalance, ppl become unhappy.
gain-loss theory of attraction
the theory that increases in positive, rewarding behavior from another person has more impact than constantly rewarding behavior; and that loses in positive behavior have more impact than constant negative behavior from another person
feeling free to talk about anything, feeling close to and understood by the loved one
euphoria and sexual excitement
a love characterized by strong emotions, sexual desire, and intense preoccupation with the beloved. Its onset is usually rapid rather than gradual. fiery intensity cools over time
a phenomenon in which, even though a person has a high degree of competence, some evidence of fallibility increases his or her attractiveness
one of the major factors determining whether we like or love someone is there physical proximity; it is more likely that we will fall in love with someone who lives near or in our town, or attends our university than with someone who lives far away
reward theory of attraction
we will like those whose behavior is rewarding to us, and we will continue relationships that offer more rewards than costs
according to Sternberg, as the relationship develops, it often moves from pure passion and blossoms into a combination of passion an intimacy that Sternberg calls romantic love.as the relationship matures further, it becomes companionate (Sternberg uses this term to describe love characterized by the combination of intimacy and commitment -without a lot of passion)
relationships are strengthened by honest self disclosure (395)
the factor that makes people tend to like and love others with similar options, attitudes, beliefs, and personalities
a clear statement of a person's feelings and concerns without accusing, blaming, judging, or ridiculing the other person
triangle of love theory
according to Sternberg, the three ingredients of love: passion (euphoria and sexual excitement), intimacy (feeling free to talk about anything, feeling close to and understood by the loved one), and commitment (needing to be with another person, feeling loyal); love can consist of one component alone or any combination of the three parts
Floor plan study
Floor Plan Study (Festinger et al., 1950)
•Tracked friendship formation in apartment buildings among students
•Randomly assigned students to different dorm rooms; 17 two story buildings with the same layout
•Where are friendships likely to develop?
•Which unit would have the most friends?
Results showed that proximity or opportunities to bump into each other on a daily basis increased chances for friendships. After some months more than 10 times as many friendships had developed with people who lived in the same building, and even more with people who lived next door.
The researchers suggest that physical proximity increases opportunities for interaction, which in turn increases familiarity.) The mere exposure effect is enough to increase liking.
Geographical proximity may still be a factor in finding friends and lovers but with the Internet, dating sites, and chat rooms people at distance can now easily contact each other and develop friendships or romantic relationships. The Internet is thus creating a "psychological proximity" that can replace the "geographical proximity".
proximity and exposure
Proximity & Exposure
•Propinquity effect (proximity)
-The more we see and interact
with people, the more likely they
are to become our friends;
•Mere exposure effect
-More exposure we have to
someone or something, the
more we like him/her/it
-Architectural design may dictate
how often we come into contact
Similarity vs. Complementar
Birds of a feather flock
•What about "opposites
supports which one?
•Opinions and personality
-Demographics, attitudes, values
-Boyden et al. (1984)
•Interests & experiences
-Situations you choose to be
-academic tracking & friendship
-Seek others that look like us
(Mackinnon et al., 2011
-Choose a similar partner
•Relationships based on differences
can be difficult to maintain
-Perceived similarity more
important than actual similarity
•Low level of commitment
('Fling' 'hook ups' 'netflix and chill')
-Choose dissimilar partners
physical attractiveness pg 367
-Differences in attitudes
•Men more likely than women to report attraction is important
-Gender similarities in behavior
•People prefer faces that most resemble their
-Little & Perrett (2002)
standards of beauty
Standards of beauty
-Symmetry is preferred.
•Size, shape, and location
of the features on one
side match the other side
-Average faces preferred,
•Composites of attractive
•People attribute positive qualities to the
•Badr & Abdallah (2001)
-They rated the facial physical
attractiveness and health
status of premature infants
born in Beirut, Lebanon
predicted health outcomes of
"what is beautiful is good" stereotype
"What is beautiful is good" stereotype
•The beautiful are thought to be more:
•How would you explain this?
handsome men got higher starting salaries and this benefit of their good looks did not fade over time as employers got to know them. pg 372
Attributions in the business world
(Frieze et al. 1992)
•A sample of 737 male and female MBA graduates from the years between 1973 and 1982 was used to explore how facial attractiveness relates to starting and later salaries.
•Handsome men got higher starting salaries
-benefit did not fade over the 10 year period of the study.
-Did not affect their starting salaries, but have an influence on salaries as they continued to work
•"Attractiveness" on a 5-point scale
-Each point was worth $2,600 (men)/ $2,150 women
•Can a "regular" person be made to
act like a "beautiful" one via the self
-If women talking to men on the phone
believe he is attractive
•Elicit warmer, friendlier responses
-Same for men (Synder et al., 1977)
•We like people who like us
•For initial attraction, reciprocal liking
-Dissimilarity in attitudes
•Gold et al. (1984)
-Attentional biases to attractive faces
•Koranyi &Rothermund (2012
reciprocal self disclosure
Reciprocal self -disclosure
•Reciprocal self-disclosure key to close relationship
-Chaiken& Derlega (1974)
•friends with...reciprocal self-disclosure
•Importance of self-disclosure
-get things off our chest
-understand own thoughts/feelings
-influence others perceptions of us
William James & Carl Lange's
Theory of Emotion (refer to notes in week 15)
William James & Carl Lange's Theory of Emotion
External Stimulus (loud noise) → Unique physiological response → Awareness
physiological response is first (signals specific emotion)
Misattribution of Arousal
•The process whereby people make mistaken
inferences about what is causing them to feel
the way they do.
•Arousal from one source can enhance the
intensity of how the person interprets other
exercise, a horror film -> attraction to someone
Dutton and Aron (1974)
Eight-five male tourists had to meet female or male research assistants in the middle of the a bridge 230 feet above the river, to write an imaginary story in response to response to drawing. The same task was conducted on another sturdy bridge just 10 feet above the river.
Males approached by the female researcher on the suspension bridge used more sexual imagery in their stories and were also more prone to call the female experimenter at a later date. Danger can increase attraction by misattribution of arousal.
What type of movie would produce the greatest amount of missattribution? Romantic, action, humorous or scary?
Cohen, Waugh, & Place (1988)- Couples were more likely to talk and touch after a suspenseful/action movie than a documentary.
Where would you predict the greatest misattribution would occur? Camels, Ibex, Baboons, Polar Bears?
Can you think of more everyday examples?
Dragon, DeBacker, Moore, & Reed(1993)- The number and length of touches were highest among couples watching exciting animals.
Whenever we encounter an arousing event, there is a chance we may misattribute the source of our arousal. What other situations can you think of that might lead to misattribution? Postive emotions, negative emotions
Types of Love
-The intimacy and affection we feel
when we care deeply for a person but
do not experience passion or arousal
in the person's presence.
-An intense longing we feel for a
person, accompanied by physiological
arousal; when our love is reciprocated,
we feel great fulfillment and ecstasy,
but when it is not, we feel sadness and
culture and love
Culture & Love
•We all love, but we do
not necessarily all love, in the same way.
-Or at least we don't
describe it in the same way
•Romantic love is nearly
universal in the human species.
- Cultural rules alter how
that emotional state is
passionate vs companionate across cultures
Passionate vs. Companionate
•Americans value passionate love more
than the Chinese
•The Chinese value companionate more
(Gao, 1993; Jankowiak, 1995; Ting
-Toomey & Chung, 1996).
•Ta i t a of Kenya value both equally (bell, 1995)
culture and love
Culture & Love
-To t a l l y p a s s i ve l ove o b j ec t , i n d u l g ed a n d taken care of by one's romantic partner
•Chinese gan qing
-Achieved by helping and working for
-Connection that ties people together
stern berg's triangular theory of love
Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love
•Dimensions: Passion, intimacy, commitment
•Where do you want to start? How do you want to progress?
Attachment Styles in Relationships
Attachment Styles in Relationships
-The expectations people develop about
relationships with others, based on the
relationship they had with their primary caregiver when they were infants.
•There are three styles:
3 attachment styles
3 attachment styles
•Secure Attachment Style
-An attachment style characterized by trust, a lack of concern with being abandoned, and the viewthat one is worthy and well-liked.
-Infants clings to mother, the toddler is more
adventurous and explores, the mother is a "safe harbor" but the child gradually becomes
Anxious/Ambivalent Attachment Style
-An attachment style characterized by a concern that others will not reciprocate one's desire for intimacy, resulting in higher-than-average levels of anxiety.
-Infant mothers are unpredictable -alternating between smothering and ignoring the infant.
-Anxious men acquired marriage licenses after a SHORTER courtship than either secure or avoidant men (Senchak & Leonard, 1992
Avoidant Attachment Style
-An attachment style characterized by a
suppression of attachment needs, because
attempts to be intimate have been rebuffed;
people with this style find it difficult to develop intimate relationships.
-Generally ignored as infants, they become
disinterested in social contact and interactions with others
attachment in the lab
Attachment in the Lab
•Attachment style predicts response to
supportive and unsupportive feedback
in lab studies.
(Collins & Feeney, 2004)
•All styles of attachment responded similarly
•Anxious and Avoidant attachment
-Reacted more calmly
Attachment style is not destiny!
Attachment style is not destiny!
•If people had unhappy relationships
with their parents, they are NOT
doomed to repeat this!
•People's experience in relationships
can help them learn new and more
healthy ways of relating to others.
•People may develop more than one
attachment style over time
Applying Sternberg's Triangle Theory of love to Attachment Theory
Attachment and Love
•Applying Sternberg's Triangle Theory of love to Attachment Theory
-Anxious/Ambivalent may resemble passionate love.
-Secure may resemble companionate love or consummate love.
-Avoidant seems reluctant to commit to a love relationship at
social psychology hypotheses
1.Situations are powerful.
2.We often don't know why
people do what they do.
3.We don't know what we
4.It is amazing that we are as
accurate as we are about
why people do what they
do and what kind of
people they are.
5.People have two
Revising the 5 hypotheses
1.Situations are powerful (because they are
•Self-fulfilling prophecies, conformity, helping / aggression,attribution
2. We don't know other minds and our minds very well
•Fundamental attribution error, implicit stereotyping, cognitive
dissonance, self-serving bias
3. We don't know what we don't know
•Self-justification, implicit stereotyping, fundamental attribution error, self
- serving bias, introspective
4. Given all that, we do pretty well
5. We have a need to belong (to be liked) and need to be authentic (and known)
•Conformity, social rejection, self-enhancement, cognitive dissonance, foot
praise and favors do not always lead to greater attraction
Research indicates that, contrary to the common-sense advice of Dale Carnegie, praise and favors are not universally rewarding and, thus, do not always lead to greater attraction. If the praise seems unwarranted, or if we think someone has an ulterior motive in praising us liking for this person will not increase and, in fact, may even decrease. Similarly, although we
do like people who do us favors, getting someone to do us a favor is a more certain way of using favors to increase our attractiveness
Reward theory suggests that we will like people more if they have pleasant or positive
characteristics. Although often true, under certain conditions this prediction does not hold. For example, research on the effects of a "pratfall" indicates that a highly competent person is liked more when he or she commits a small blunder than if he or she performed in a perfectly competent manner
Physical beauty plays an important role in determining whether people will be initially
attracted to each other. People also tend to perceive physically attractive people as having more desirable personality traits than less attractive individuals. These perceptions can have profound effects on how people are treated and how they, in turn, behave toward others. Thus, in a study by Snyder, Tanke, and Berscheid, men who thought they were talking on the phone with an attractive woman rated her more positively, compared with men who thought they were talking with a less-attractive woman. More interesting, however, is that independent judges who listened to the woman's half of the conversation—but who did not see her photo— also rated the attractive woman more positively, indicating that the expectations and behavior of the male participant had a strong impact on the behavior of the woman with whom he interacted
whether we like someone depends on whether they like us
In addition to physical beauty, one of the most powerful determinants of whether we like someone is whether that person likes us. Moreover, research indicates that mere perception of being liked can initiate a spiraling series of events that promote increasingly positive feelings
and behavior between two people. That is, when we believe someone likes us, we tend to act on those beliefs—treating that person in a friendly, warm manner. Our behavior, in turn, leads the other person to feel liked, and to treat us in a friendly manner
similarity and attraction
Although there is a strong relationship between similarity and attraction, other factors can
weaken this relationship. For example, research indicates that we are more inclined to like
someone whose attitudes are dissimilar to ours, as long as we are secure in the knowledge that
this person already likes us—despite our different beliefs. Similarly, when we feel strongly
about an issue we tend to find a person more attractive when they initially disagree with us,
but are later "converted" to our way of thinking. Research also suggests that, under certain
limited conditions, marital satisfaction is greater when partners have dissimilar, but
complementary, needs and characteristics
conclusion of one study showed that the students who received unfavorable info about themselves from the personality test showed far more liking for their male admirer, than those who received favorable info about themselves. in short, we like to be liked. and the more insecure we feel, the more we like someone who likes us.
Most people fear social rejection—and for good reason. There appears to be physiological consequences to being rejected. For example, people who recalled past rejections felt the room
they were in was significantly colder (Zhong & Leonardelli) and those excluded during a ball-tossing game rated hot soup and hot coffee as significantly more desirable than did control participants. apparently, one symptom of social exclusion is the physical sensation of being cold. In addition, some experiments indicate that symptoms of rejection are associated with physiological responses, and brain activity, related to pain. For example, participants excluded from a ball-tossing game while their brains were being scanned in an fMRI showed
increased activity in the dorsal anterior cingulate cortex and right anterior insula, areas of the brain involved in the experience of pain. However, if they had been given a dose of Tylenol prior to the playing the game, these regions did not show heightened activity. Although rejection can clearly be painful, social contact can reduce the physical symptoms of social
rejection. For example, the fMRI of happily married women who held the hand of their
husbands while they anticipated a shock to their ankle showed significantly reduced
anticipatory pain responses than did women who held the hand of a stranger (Coan, et al.).
Why might there be a link between the experience of physical pain and the experience of social rejection? One explanation involving evolutionary theory argues that in our ancient past
reliance on the group was a matter of survival. Therefore, social rejection severely reduced a person's ability to reproduce and survive. Those predisposed to take inclusion and exclusion very seriously passed on their genes to the next generation. Thus, according to this explanation, we are wired to keenly feel even minor instances of rejection because of the survival advantage acceptance provided in our long ago past.
anticipation of rejection can have a major impact on intellectual performance
gain loss theory of attraction
Research on the gain-loss theory of attraction reveals that we tend to like someone more if
they initially express disliking for us, but gradually come to feel positively toward us. Contrary to reward theory, our attraction is greater under such conditions than if the person had consistently expressed positive views about us all along. Gainloss theory has important implications for long-term relationships. Over time, the positive regard of people who love us becomes less rewarding; yet, because we have grown accustomed to their affection, their power to hurt us is all the greater when, for whatever reason, they become critical or withhold their affection from us.
gain loss theory. suggests that increases in positive, rewarding behavior from another person have more of an impact on an individual than constantly rewarding behavior from tht person.
Social psychologists have developed different ways of classifying love. One theory suggests there are two forms of love: passionate and companionate. Another classification, the triangle
of love theory, describes love as some combination of intimacy, passion, and commitment. Both theories make the distinction between love based on strong emotions, sexual desire, and intense preoccupation with the beloved and love that is a milder, more stable experience
marked by feelings of trust, dependability, and warmth.
proximity and similarity two important factors to falling in love.
A distinction also can be made between communal relationships, in which people respond to others based on the others' needs, and exchange relationships, in which the focus is on equity between participants. The closer a relationship is, the more communal it is, as demonstrated in
Honest and sensitive communication plays a vital role in establishing and maintaining intimate relationships over time. Yet, this is no easy matter. A general lesson of our society is to protect ourselves by concealing our feelings and to react defensively to others when engaged in an interpersonal conflict. One strategy for effective communication lies in learning how to use straight talk in our dealings with others. Straight talk involves a clear expression of our feelings, rather than blaming or attacking the other person with our negative judgments. This form of communication facilitates conflict resolution by allowing the other person to react to
our concerns in a Non-defensive manner, thereby preventing negative feelings from escalating
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