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Terms in this set (84)
Karen: That's it.
Regina: Wait. Why don't I know you?
Cady: I don't know. I'm new here. I used to be home-schooled.
Regina: Wait, what?
Cady: I just moved here from Africa.
Regina: Shut up! Shut up!
Cady: I didn't say anything.
Regina: You're like, really pretty.
Regina: So you agree? You think you're really pretty?
Cady: Oh, I don't know...
Regina: Oh my God, I love your bracelet. Where did you get it?
Gretchen: It's so fetch.
Regina: What is "fetch"?
Karen: Do me!
Regina: Oh my God, Jason, stop skeezing on the new girl. No one thinks you're funny and your teeth look like corn. Also this thing you're doing where you try to lower your voice when you talk is making people sad. Anyone who would like Jason Weems to go back to his normal voice please raise your hand.
Jason Weems: B*tch.
Regina: Wow. You're really gonna get noticed around here. We should help you. Can you give us some privacy?
Plastics: Here's where you belong.
Regina: No, really say it.
Cady: That seems fair.
Regina: A hundred and twenty calories and forty-eight calories from fat. What percent is that?
Karen: There's no way of knowing.
Regina: I'm only eating foods with less than thirty percent calories from fat.
Cady: It's forty percent. Forty-eight over a hundred and twenty equals "x" over a hundred, and then you cross-multiply and get the value of "x".
Regina: Whatever. I'm getting cheese fries.
Gretchen: You can't join Mathletes. It's social su*cide.
Regina: Mathletes? Ew, no. Why is he by our table?
Kevin G: I can hear you, by the way.
Regina: Can you hear me now?
Kevin G: Bet. Take my card in case you change your mind. I also deejay. And I designed that font, so... byeeeee!
Regina: D*mn. You are so lucky you have us to guide you. Meet me after school. I'm gonna take you to the mall and buy you some shoes.
Lizzie Therman: They tell us to be ourselves. They tell us looks don't matter. And then they literally have a school contest every year where we give Regina a crown.
Regina: Cady, look at these shoes. I might buy you the suede heels. To lift your butt.
Cady: Your room is really nice.
Regina: I know, right? It was my parents' room, but I made them trade me. Gretchen, move.
Gretchen: Sorry! Ugh, my hips are so wide.
Regina: I need to lose three pounds.
Mrs. George: Did you fly b*techies come in through the garage? I didn't even hear you.
Regina: Maybe that was on purpose.
Mrs. George: Well, who are you?! We haven't had new meat in our little lady taco in so long!
Mrs. George: Well it's just a matter of time. I always say, this school district has the highest taxes but the hottest boys, so-
Mrs. George: Oh, Regina! You'll never guess what I found in the back of your closet!
Regina: Why were you in my closet?
Mrs. George: I was doing that Japanese organizing thing where you take a little nap in a closet. Anyway, I found your- Buuurnbooook! Cady, this was just the funniest thing they used to do-
Regina: Mommy, get out.
Gretchen: Check it out, Cady. We cut out people's pictures from the yearbook and then we wrote comments. "Trang Pak is a grotsky little beyotch."
Regina: Still true.
Gretchen: "Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin."
Regina: Still half true.
Gretchen: "Janis Sarkisian. Space-d*ke." I forgot about that.
Regina: Oh my God, she's so weird.
Cady: She is? She's in my homeroom.
Regina: Well watch out cause she's mental. People think she's really good at art but it's cause she had to do "art therapy."
Gretchen: Regina and Janis were best friends in middle school.
Regina: She was, like, obsessed with me. Then when I couldn't invite her to my 13th birthday'cause my mom said I could only have six people, she went insane.
Cady: I didn't mean that in a bad way-
Regina: No. That's funny. Put that in there.
Gretchen: Cady, don't worry. We only write stuff about "randos" in here. Friends are, like, very deserving of respect and-
Regina: -Gretchen, she gets it. Karen, come with me. I wanna change your eyebrows.
Gretchen: If you don't dress sl
tty, that's "sl
Regina: Gretchen! Why did you invite Cady? We don't have to take her everywhere you know.
Gretchen: I didn't!
Regina: And honestly you shouldn't want her around 'cause she's kind of "exotic cute" in the same way you are, only fresher.
Gretchen: Thank you for your feedback. But she came by herself 'cause she's obsessed with this guy from her math class or something-
Regina: She likes a senior? That's a little "confident." Who is it?
Aaron: Okay then, it's a deal. Let me get you a drink. Wait right here.
Regina: I know your secret.
Regina: Gretchen told me you like Aaron Samuels.
Cady: Gretchen what? I'm sorry, I- I didn't know-
Regina: I don't care. I think you guys would be a cute couple.
Regina: I just said so. Don't be thirsty. I could talk to him for you if you want.
Cady: You would do that? Nothing embarrassing, right?
Regina: Duh. I have to talk to you.
Aaron: Me? I thought you were done talking to me last summer when you started "talking to" Shane-
Regina: Don't be weird. Okay, you know how that Cady girl just showed up here tonight-
Aaron: She's not crashing. I invited her.
Regina: No, I know. Just, like, be careful. 'Cause she has a huge crush on you.
Regina: Don't be gross. She's my friend and she's really babyish and inexperienced and- -wow, I didn't think this would be so hard for me. Just promise me you won't break her heart like you did mine.
Damian: She said what?! Oh, Regina is a hot liar! No! I must! What actually happened was Regina came up to Janis before school where no adults could see her and was like...
Regina: Janis, I can't invite you to my pool party, 'cause I think you're a lesbian. And I can't have a lesbian at my party. There's gonna be girls there in their bathing suits.
Damian: She just kept asking her.
Regina: I mean, are you a lesbian?! What are you?
Cady: Ugh, I'm so fat and disgusting! I use these Kälteen diet bars when I need to lose weight.
Regina: I need to lose three pounds. How many calories from fat?
Cady: Zero. You cross-multiply x over a thousand and then divide it by point five 'cause it's kilograms-
Regina: Whatever. Bring me a whole box.
Cady: Hey, girl. You sending any candy canes?
Regina: I don't send them. I just get them. Stop pulling it down! Your hair looks s
xy pushed back. Cady, will you please tell him his hair looks s
xy pushed back?
Gretchen: Let it all out, honey. Put it in the book.
Regina: This skirt won't close. Cady, these Kälteen bars suck.
Cady: No, you have to make sure you eat enough carbs to... activate them.
Regina: Stop playing with that stupid babyish book and help me find a safety pin!
Karen: Aw, she would never hurt me. She's just doing it to be funny.
Regina: Karen, I can see your bra.
Karen: It's on purpose. I'm going for a look.
Regina: Is it "girl who's slept with eleven people?" 'Cause you're nailing it.
Gretchen: I think your top looks fetch.
Regina: Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!
Cafeteria-Regina enters with her lunch
Regina: I mean, honestly, I wasn't the worst thing at that talent show. Wait, is butter a carb?
Regina: Did you change your hair?
Regina: I like it. Gretchen, move!
Gretchen: I'm sorry, Regina. You can't sit with us.
Gretchen: Youre wearing sweatpants. It's Thursday
Regina: Whatever. Those rules aren't real.
Karen: They were real the day I wore a vest!
Regina: Because that vest was disgusting!
Gretchen: You can't sit with us! I think. You probably shouldn't sit with us?
Regina: These sweatpants are all that fit me right now.
Cady: Rules are rules.
Regina: Fine. Take a picture, losers! It'll last longer!
All: We are fearless!
Regina: I forgot these.
Cady: Regina, I'm sorry this had to happen.
Regina: What had to happen? I'm not dead. I'll see you in gym in eight minutes. Enjoy your eight minutes.
Mrs. George: You still on the treadmill, baby?
Regina: No, I'm over there.
Mrs. George: Honey, I know you're not happy with your body right now but remember, real beauty comes from the face.
Regina: Don't ever talk about my body! God!
Mrs. George: Okay- okay! Let me make you a low-cal snack! I have some shrimp I can spray with that butter-flavored Pam-
Regina: Mommy, I can't have shrimp! I'm on an all carb diet!! Why won't you leave me alone?!?!
Mrs. George: Because Cady's having a party!!
Mrs. George: Whaaat? Cady's having a party! With Gretchen and Karen. I saw it on one of the many fake social media accounts I have for your safety.
Regina: Those b*tches!
Mrs. George: Right?! Well, eff those bees! Me and you are our own party! You wanna make popcorn and-
Regina: Get out!
Mrs. George: alike, honey, why are you eating a Kälteen bar? Those are what we gave Nanna Joan when she needed to gain weight.
Regina: I wanna watch the world burn, and ev'ryone get-
Regina: -just so upset, Mr. Duvall! I found it in the girls' bathroom. I mean, the things it says about me. The things it says about all of us.
Mr. Duvall: Is this true? Rachel Hamilton fills her inhaler with vodka? Is that- does that work? Ms. Norbury is a "sad old drug pusher"? What does this say? Caityn Caussin has what?
Regina: "Hairy nips."
Mr. Duvall: Good lord. Well, don't worry. We're gonna find out who did this.
Regina: There's only three girls in the whole school who aren't in it.
Ms. Norbury: Interesting.
Regina: Can I just say, I don't think we have a clique problem at this school. All this happened because of a few bad people. And some of us shouldn't have to participate in whatever this is, because some of us are just victims in this situation.
Ms. Norbury: Okay, go home, sweetheart.
Regina: Oh my God, it's her dream come true. Diving into a big pile of girls.
Cady: Regina, wait-
Regina: You know what they say about you? They say you are a homeschooled jungle freak who's a less hot version of me.
Cady: I never meant to hurt-
Regina: So you can take your fake apology, roll it up tight and shove it up your fat hairy-
Cady: Regina! You look pretty.
Regina: I'm wearing a spinal halo.
Cady: I'm sorry about the bus. I feel like it's all my fault.
Regina: Stop making this about you. I'm the one who got hit by a bus.
Cady: Well, I'm sorry about all the other stuff too.
Regina: Okay. Yeah. I'm going to forgive you. Because I'm on a lot of pain medication right now. You know I died for fifteen seconds, right? Spoiler alert: heaven looks like a really nice hotel in Miami.
Cady: That must have been scary.
Regina: When I woke up in the street, all I could see was my mom's face and Gretchen's big face looking down at me. And they looked so surprised. Not even sad, just like, surprised that I could be bleeding. Like they forgot I was a human person. I've actually been a human person this whole time.
Cady: I know. It's weird when people treat you like you're famous or something.
Regina: It's amazing until it's not. I know I have to change. I know I was harsh. And people say I'm a b*tch. But you know what they would call me if I was a boy?
Regina: "Reginald". That's what my mom was gonna name me if I was a boy, so honestly I'd rather be "b*tch".
Cady: Well I'm sorry if I took your spot in the food chain-
Regina: Not your fault. Don't apologize for things that aren't your fault. And never apologize for being a boss. If you're going to be happy in life, Cady, you have to not care what people say about you. Like truly not care. That's what I keep trying to explain to the President on Twitter but he blocked me. Hahahahaha. Love ya!
Cady: Wow. Um, I think people voted for me 'cause they think I pushed someone in front of a bus. Which is terrible.
Regina: Not your fault! Don't apologize!
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