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Terms in this set (35)

1. standing up for one's basic human rights
- "i have the right to express my opinion"
2. assuming responsibility for own statements
- "i dont want to go out with you tonight" instead of " i can't go out with you tonight". the latter implies a lack of power or ability
3. responding as a "broken record"
- persistently repeating in a calm voice what is wanted
4. Agreeing assertively
- assertively accepting negative aspects about oneself, admitting when an error has been made
5. Inquiring Assertively
- seeking additional information about a critical statement
- "were you offended that I spoke up for my beliefs, or was it because my beliefs are in opposition with yours"
6. shifting from content to process
- changing the focus of the communication from discussing the topic at hand, to analyzing what is actually going on in the interaction
- "sounds to me like we need to discuss some other things here. what are you really angry about"
7. Clouding or fogging
- concurring with the critic's argument without becoming defensive and without agreeing to change
" you never come to any of the meetings, i don't know why you even belong!" - "you're right. I haven't attended very many meetings"
8. Defusing
- putting off further discussion with an angry individual until he or she is calm
" you are very angry right now. I don't want to discuss this matter with you while you are so upset. I will discuss it with you in my office at 3:00 this afternoon"
9. Delaying assertively
- putting off further discussion with another individual until you specifically are calmer
10. Responding assertively with irony
- "i bet you're one of them so-called women's libbers, arent you?" - "why, yes. thank you for noticing"
11. Using "I" statements
- allows the individual to take ownership for his or her feelings rather than saying they are caused by another person