Comm 344

Conflict
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Terms in this set (61)
Conflict
An expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive scarce resources, incompatible values, or goal interference.
How do people describe their conflicts?
1. Natural Disasters 2. Military Action 3. Fights between Animals
Vucinich findings on family quarrels
Stages: provokation, challenge, resisting, persistence. Average time is two speaking turns. Same sex parent/children more likely to fight.
Attenuation Factor
Tendency to keep fights short so as to avoid physical aggression, hurting relationships.
3 ways to express conflict directly
1. Argument 2. Complaining 3. Nagging
Alberts research on complaining
Overwhelmingly about a specific behavior of the partner. Desired response: agree and comply. Most common responses: 1. defend or justify actions 2. counter-complain 3. claim complaint is inappropriate
Findings on Nagging
Women are more likely to nag, but men do it too. The more a wife nags, the less likely a husband is to comply. We need to redefine our nagging as a positive and show it as a sign of concern and care.
Bell's findings on conflicts in friendship networks
People try to keep fights between two in a network under wraps cause they're worried people will take sides. In reality, networks will usually try to resolve constructively so as to not break the network
Resnick et al: What differentiates arguments?
Louder, involve more personal criticism, higher level of disagreement, more sarcasm, people talk faster, gesturing DOES NOT differ, obscenity DOES NOT differ
Benoit & Benoit: Who do we fight with?
1. Dating partners 2. Family 3. Friends. Average argument 3-5 min but people estimate 20-30 min. We fight with people we care about and those who have an equal amount of power as us. 66% of arguments end in "no resolution"
According to Roloff, serial arguments are produced by:1. violated expectations 2. differences in fundamental values 3. habits 4. contextual things (money, kids, in-laws)What people do wrong in serial arguments1. Demand/Withdrawal 2. Mutual Hostility 3. Scripted Argument. People cope with serial arguments by making positive comparisons and selectively ignoring themReasons to withhold complaints from partner (7)1. Problem not that important 2. afraid of partner's reaction 3. afraid of partner leaving 4. relationship not intimate enough 5. talking about it pointless 6. right moment has not occurred 7. prefer to express indirectlyMethods of indirect expression of conflict (7)1. silent treatment 2. dysfunctional beliefs (mind-reading) 3. denial of support 4. denial of sex 5. hidden agendas 6. making partner jealous 7. teasing3 forms of interdependency1. Facilitation 2. Influence 3. InterferencePassive conflict styleNon-assertive, non-confrontational, fear conflict. Compliant, apologetic, indirect. Tend to be very likable.Passive-agressive conflict styleNon-confrontational but find ways to get even. Silent treatment, sullenness, deceit. Not well-liked.Aggressive conflict styleExert influence by insulting and threatening. Low in reasoning ability, not smart. Runs in family. Not well-liked.Assertive conflict styleComfortable and confident expressing their viewpoints. Direct and rational, have boundaries to what they will accept. But they are not more well-liked because they often come off as too direct and rude.Empathetic AssertivenessGives a rationale that does not attack the other person. They are more well-liked.Escalating AssertivenessThey originally say no, then become more assertive.Trends in assertivenessWe like people who are the same level of assertiveness as us. If you believe in gender norms, you like assertive men more than assertive womenFalse-consciousness EffectEveryone believes their behavior is normal, even when its notDefensive-attribution biasWhen conflicts break out, you side with the person you can identify most withSentiment override hypothesisThe way you interpret your partner's behavior is a function of how you feel about them at the timeEgo-centric biasPeople tend to give themselves more credit for accomplishing a task than others wouldRole-driven biasConfronter feels the problem has been going on for a while. Person confronted feels it is coming out of nowhereIncompatible valuesH/W traditional: little conflict, relatively happy. H/W modern: fair amount of conflict, very happy. H tradit, W modern: most conflict, least satisfaction. H Modern, W traditional: V Rare!Goal interference can be:Behavioral or AttributionalBlood & Wolf findingsFound that husbands make more of the decisions, and that this increases based on how much money he makes.Principle of Least InterestPerson who needs the relationship least can dictate its nature.Scanzoni's 4 types of marraiges1. Wife as property 2. Wife as complimentary partner 3. Wife as junior partner 4. Wife as equal partnerBlomberg's other factors that contribute to powerMacro level: cultural norms, economy, age cohort. Micro level: love, type of spending, physical attractivenessEffect of education on powerIncreases wife's power, decreases husbands because the more education a couple has, the more modern gender roles they believe inHouseworkGap is closing with time, but wives still do way moreJohnson's gendered power strategiesMasculine: 1. coercion 2. legitimacy 3. expertise 4. access to information. Feminine: 1. personal reward 2. sexuality 3. helplessnessOther notes on dependencyMore physically attractive person often less dependent. In marriage, husband is more emotionally dependent. Husband's power diminishes with each additional child. Lesbians are egalitarian. Gays power comes from physical attractiveness, age, incomeShared Decision-making modelShows flaws with Blood & Wolf because wives make a lot of decisions regardless of incomeFalbo & PeplanMen use Bilateral Direct more, Women, children use Unilateral Indirect more.Bandura's Social Learning Model of AggressionPeople aren't born aggressive, they learn from their family and peer group. We are not inherently aggressive. It requires models, instigators and reinforcement.What instigates aggression?1. Verbal attacks 2. physical assault 3. authority approval 4. incentives 5. contagion 6. bizarre symbolic controlReinforcement of aggression1. External 2. Vicarious 3. SelfTemperamentPossible biological component of aggression. How you react to stress. Runs in families.HeatClearly increases aggressiveness due to physical arousal from being uncomfortableDisplaced AggressionRequires a short time period between the two events, element of similarity, no fear of retaliationAlcoholCauses anger to increase but not fear. Facilitator of aggression but not the cause. Causes people to misperceive things, low self-awareness, low coordinationRoad RageMen, young, fancy cars, high need for controlHomicidePredominantly male on male, usually acquaintances. Firearms most common weapon, argument most common cause.BerkowitzFrustration is key to aggression. Goals-->Obstacles-->Frustration-->Anger and FearLabeling EffectSlogans implying aggression inspire aggressive reactions (bumper sticker test)Cues people use to determine level of aggression (7)1. Intent 2. how much injury 3. norm deviation 4. initiated vs. reactive 5. pro or anti-social 6. alternatives 7. gender of victim and perpetratorLuckenbill's steps leading to murder (6)1. Victim insults murderer 2. murderer takes offense personally 3. murderer takes action (86% by telling victim to shut up, 14% by killing), 4. victim responds to challenge 5. killing 6. aftermath (58% flees, 42% stays voluntarily)Other interesting notes on homicideMost common response of witnesses is to actively try and help the murderer! Victim is actively involved in the interaction. Other people being present, alcohol and weapons increase aggression. Victims were more likely to have a weapon at the beginning of the interaction.Code of HonorNotion of standing ground when faced with a challenge. Biggest in the South and West.Felson on retaliationPeople likely to retaliate unless: Insult unintentional, insult accurate, something about the situation unusual. More likely to retaliate if: public setting, insult hits a key part of identityGender differences in aggressionBegin to surface between 17 and 29 months. Peak in teens and 20's then even out. Males more physical, Females more verbalMale Model of aggressionFair-fight rule. Attacking a weaker person is frowned upon, but if equal, backing down is cowardlyFemale model of aggressionOnly act aggressively if they lose self control. Some cry which is embarrassing, but only use physical aggression in total losses of control. Women who abuse are high anxiety, high need for affiliation, low impulse controlRusfelt: Ways of coping when partner upsets you1. Voice your concerns (constructive and active) 2. Loyalty (constructive and passive) 3. Neglect (destructive and passive) 4. Exit (destructive and active)AccomodationWhen you respond positively and try to work it out. This takes high self and impulse control, but rarely changes partner's behavior.Factors influencing commitment1. satisfaction in relationship 2. investment in relationship 3. alternatives